Five Years Later
by Detective Castiel Winchester
Summary: It has been five years since Elliot left the unit, friends, and family. All of a sudden, he returns to New York and sees that everyone has moved on with their lives, everyone but him. How will he deal with everything he is about to find out? E/O in the future!
1. Chapter 1

**Five Years Later**

**A/N: I know I have started a new story "Living With Fear" but I have like five chapter done for that one... And I need to put up a new chapter for "Hold On" but i'm losing inspiration for that one so I don't know... On to this one. This one just wouldn't leave my head and I decided to use my new laptop to do that one... (: Enough of my babbling. **

**Summary: It has been five years since Elliot left Special Victims. Now, all of a sudden, he returns to New York and sees that everyone has moved on with their lives, but him. How will he deal with everything he is about to find out?**

**Chapter One:**

* * *

><p>Elliot Stabler made his way up the threesteps of the porch of the house he is so familiar with, but after five years of not seeing it, he can see a major difference in it. It has been five years. Yes, five long years, and he thinks he is okay now.<p>

He can't believe it has been that long since he last saw his family – his kids and, now, ex-wife. It has been five years since he last saw his close friends that were like family to him – Fin, Munch, Don, and most importantly, it has been five years since he last saw _her_.

How is she doing? Is she okay? Does she still work at Special Victims? If so, then what is her new partner like? Does he have her back like he used to have hers before his sudden departure? Does she miss him? Does she look back at the times when they were partners and best friends? Is she finally seeing someone? Is he nice? Does he treat her like she deserves to be treated?

So many questions are buzzing in his mind, like angry wasps, that need to be answered, but first, he needs to see his children... If they were even with Kathy. His children are all grown up, except for Eli, and he wonders how each and every one of them may be doing. Maureen and Kathleen were living on their own when he left; Dickie and Lizzie were freshmen in high school, so now they must be freshmen in college; and last but not least, Little Eli was left at four years old by him. How is his little boy doing? Does he remember his daddy?

Inhaling deeply, Elliot brings his knuckles up and knocks on the door. He hears several voices and loud movements from the other side. A minute later, the door is opened by a young teenage boy with reddish brown hair and midnight blue eyes. The boy is about two, three, maybe even four inches shorter than Elliot, and does not appear older than the age fourteen.

"Uh, how can I help you, sir?" The boy's voice cracks, signifying that he is going through puberty. He also speaks with an accent... An English accent, Elliot realizes.

"Is Kathy home?" Now Elliot is unsure if Kathy lives there anymore since this unfamiliar boy answered the door.

Right as his question leaves his mouth, a blond woman – in her forties – walks up from behind the boy with reddish brown hair, but does not notice Elliot yet. "Dillon, who is-?" her eyes grow wide once she sees Elliot standing there. She is speechless, Elliot can tell she is. Any second now, she is going to explode. "Go check on your brother, Dillon." she tells the young man, calmly, before looking back at Elliot.

Elliot watches the teenager, named Dillon, turn around and climb up the stairs that are oh-so familiar to him. He looks at Kathy, his ex-wife, as she moves to the side, letting him enter what used to be his home as well.

"Kathy-," Elliot beings but is cut off.

"What are you doing here?" she asks softly as she wraps her arms around herself when they sit down on a sofa he does not recognize.

Elliot sighs and shifts on the sofa, getting a little comfortable. "I came to see my son." he simply says, but apparently that is not the answer she wants to hear.

Kathy shakes her head in disbelief and scoffs, "It took you five years to come back... You have some nerve, Elliot."

"I know what I did is unacceptable, and you have every right to be upset with me, but please," he sucks in a deep breath, "I want to see my little boy." he pleads.

Kathy runs her fingers though her gold locks before nodding, "He isn't so little anymore, Elliot," she chuckles before becoming serious again, "But this conversation is far from over." she says sternly.

Elliot nods, "He's about nine, right?"

Kathy nods once more, "Yes, you missed his fifth, sixth, seventh, eighth and ninth birthday." she says a bit too harshly. Eli's birthday was three months back, and every year he wishes for the exact same thing. "Every year, he wishes for his daddy to come home," she informs him before getting up and heads towards the stairs, "Dillon is helping him with his homework right now, then he is off to bed."

"I'm so sorry." he is referring to Eli who had wished for him to come home every year. He feels disgusted with himself by being a coward and running away from everything and everyone. "Who is Dillon?" he asks as they walk down the hall.

"Apologize to him – not me" she pauses as they reach the door to Eli's bedroom and looks up at Elliot, "Do you remember Jane?" she waits for him to nod or shake his head. Once he nods, she continues, "That's her son – my nephew. She and her husband, William, were in a car accident that took their lives three years ago. He was sent from England to live with me a few weeks before he turned eleven."

That explains the boy's English accent, Elliot concludes. The boy lost both his parents at such a young age. That gets him thinking. What if something had happened to Kathy while he was hiding out in Utah? Everyone had lost contact with him after a few months because he had gotten rid of every way possible to contact with him. It was like he fell off the face of the earth. So, if something happened to Kathy, then where would Eli go? Elliot never thought about that. Kathy's only sister lived in England, who then died, and her only brother was deployed overseas. Her parents and his mother were in a retirement home. Elliot and Kathy's older children? Would Maureen or Kathleen take him? And Elliot's siblings probably wouldn't want to another kid with in their home. But family is family, though; he had walked out on his.

Kathy opens the door to the fourth grader's bedroom. She pokes her head in and sees Dillon helping Eli with his homework. Both boys knew that they are not brothers, but they had gotten so close that even Dillon started calling Kathy "mum", "mother", and sometimes even "mummy". Dillon would never forget his biological parents that had raised him for the first ten, almost eleven, years of his life.

Eli looks up from his math worksheet and smiles at his mother. "What's up, mom?" he sits up on his knees, and so does Dillon.

"Someone is here to see you, Eli." she sounds nervous, and that does not go unnoticed by both boys. Eli glances over at Dillon, who shrugs. Eli nods and opens the door all the way. First, first he just sees his mother, so he thinks that the guest is downstairs in the living area, then he sees a figure standing around the corner. He can't quite tell who it is. He furrows his brow, then looks up at Kathy and begins to walk down the hall. When he rounds the corner, he gasps.

Elliot, nervously, kneels down and slowly puts his arms around the young boy. He doesn't feel Eli return the embrace until a moment later. He feels hot tears seep into his gray tee shirt, and he can't help but let his tears fall, too. Elliot doesn't know what words to say to his little boy so he remains silent with his arms around Eli. It feels good having him in his arms because in his arms Elliot feels that Eli is safe.

"Why did you leave us?" Eli pulls back just enough to look at Elliot in the eyes. Same blue eyes stare into the other. His cheeks are flushed and tear-stained but more tears continue to fall. "Did we do something wrong-g? Is th-that why you left u-us?" he buried his face in his father's shoulder.

Elliot looks up at Kathy, who had her arms around Dillon. Elliot looks down at his son and buries his nose in his son's dark brown hair. "No, Eli," he whispers, "You guys didn't do anything, buddy."

"Th-then why'd you leave?" his question is muffled by Elliot's shoulder.

"I'm so sorry, Eli." Elliot picks him up as he rises up to his feet. "I missed you so much." he avoids the question because it is best for a nine-year-old not to know the reason why he left in the first place.

"Eli, go finish up your homework, and let me talk to your daddy, okay?" Kathy tries to pry Eli away, but the boy just holds on tighter to Elliot.

Elliot pats Eli's back, "Come one, bud, I am going to be here when you're done." he assures Eli.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

Eli and Dillon walk back to Eli's room to finish up his homework.

Elliot and Kathy go back downstairs to the living room, sitting down on the sofa they sat in earlier.

"So, how are the other kids?" he asks her after a moment of awkward silence. He is really curious as to what his older children are up to.

Kathy smiles, proudly, at the thought of her children. "Maureen got engaged to Nathan last year. She majored in criminology as did Kathleen." Kathleen recently graduated and is out looking for a place to hire her in that field. "Lizzie received a scholarship." She knows she has to tell him about their eldest son, Dickie. But how? Apparently she takes too long because Elliot asks about Dickie. She hesitates and looks down, "Richard should be home soon." She sighs. "He… He's a senior in high school." She sees how Elliot's smile quickly disappears.

Elliot is in shock. "He's a senior in high school? He's supposed to be a freshman like Lizzie." He shakes his head. "What happened?"

"He…When you left he went in to some depression, you could say. He was making bad choices, like, he had turned to cigarettes – he quit, just letting you know." She sighs and looks over at the graduation picture of Lizzie. "He stopped doing his work and failed his freshman year of high school. He acted as if he didn't care if he graduated high school or not. He didn't have a motivation, he told Maureen that. He said 'if dad feels like he can quit and leave, then I'll follow his footsteps.' he was planning on dropping out of high school. He didn't just change emotionally; he changed physically. He lost weight – a little too much – and he rarely slept; he had dark shadows under his eyes all the time; he was almost never hungry; he didn't smile much – this was such a huge problem, Elliot, but we got him help. He spoke to a therapist – he still does – and he came to the realization that doing what he was doing wasn't going to go around to you and make you come back.

"He told me last year that if he acted the way he did, then you'll find out and come back to yell at him; scold him; punish him, and so on. He just wanted his father back, and I'm sorry if this makes you feel bad, Elliot."

Elliot nods and forces the tears back. "Where is he now?" he asks. He feels much worse than he already had. His son had failed the ninth grade because of him! His son wanted to drop out of high school because of him! His son turned to cigarettes, why? Oh, yes, because of him!

"He should be walking through the door any minute now. He is tutoring two eighth graders with science – his strongest subject. Ever since he received a little help for his depression, he started to volunteer more. He loves helping out the younger children – especially those with down-syndrome. Despite his problem when he was fourteen and fifteen, I'm really proud of what he's become. He's a good man, Elliot." She smiles and the front door opens.

"Ma, I'm home." The male voice yells as he walks to the kitchen to get a snack.

Elliot notices how different Dickie's voice is now than when he was fourteen. Puberty. His son is all grown up, and Elliot smiles, but he knows he's going to have to deal with the young man now. Will he be angry?

"Dickie –."

She is cut off my Dickie, who is still in the kitchen, rummaging through the pantry. "It's Richard, mom." He laughs. "We discussed this already. I'm nineteen – an adult – I can't go by some baby name anymore." He says then lets out an "Ah-Ha!" meaning he found something to eat.

Kathy chuckles and shakes her head, "Alright, Richard but always remember, that you will always be my little boy. You could be thirty for all I care and I will still call you my baby." She and Elliot hear the man groan and laugh.

That laugh makes Elliot's heart swell. It has been so long.

"So are the boo –." He stops himself from talking once he walked into the living room. He drops his box of crackers and stares wide-eyed at the man before him. He looks over at his mother; his mouth is partly open in shock.

"Dickie.."

"It's Richard." Dickie spat, angrily.

"Okay then, Richard…"

"What are you doing here?" he glares at Elliot. If looks could kill, Elliot would probably be dead by now. "Why are you here?"

"I came to see my family, Richard –." Elliot tries to talk to his son, but Dickie keeps cutting him off.

Dickie shakes head in disbelief, "You lost your family when you walked out on us five years ago. Five years later you think you can just show up out of the blue?" he chuckles darkly. "You think you can show up when you feel like it? Why now? Why not…. Why leave at all? Whatever the hell you were going through, we could have helped you! We were your damn family!" he yells and throws his hands up in air as he paces the room. He runs his hand through his dark hair, looking much like his father.

Elliot tries to say something again, but Dickie continues, "No. Don't say a word. Let me process the fact that my father is now sitting right in front of me… Somewhere where I needed him to be my whole high school career." He lets out a sarcastic laugh. "We went through hell without you here. Eli constantly asked where daddy was. The girls needed their damn father – their protector. I was there for them when you weren't and this started when I was fifteen! I had to grow up at fifteen and be the man of the house!" he punches the wall and Kathy flinches. "That's why I got the help I needed after I failed ninth grade – to help my family. I would be the shoulder the girls would cry on; I would be the one that taught Eli the basics of football; I would be the one to help him out with his homework when mom couldn't…. I became his hero." He is done yelling at his father and walks out the back door through the kitchen.

"Go talk to him, Elliot." Kathy tells him softly as she walks over to the stairs to check on Eli and Dillon to see how much of the homework they got done.

Elliot nods and goes after Dickie. He opens the back door and sees Dickie sitting on one of the steps with a cigarette in his mouth. He frowns, but he can't do anything about it. Dickie is past the legal age to smoke, so he has to let his son do as he wishes.

"I haven't had one of these since I was fifteen." Dickie says softly as he takes another drag of his cigarette. "It takes the pain away but only temporarily. I would smoke just to make me feel better… A little numb, I guess." He laughs and looks at Elliot, who has taken himself to sit next to him. "Why are you back?"

It doesn't go unnoticed by Elliot that Dickie hasn't called him "dad". "I told you, Dickie… er… Richard, I wanted to see you guys."

"But why now? Why did you wait so long?" he asks as he puts out the cancer stick.

Elliot sighs, "I… I don't know, son." He rests his elbows on his knees and hangs his head, in shame. "I just needed to get away from everything… everyone…"

"What happened at work, dad?"

Hearing that d work makes him smile just the tiniest bit.

"There was a shooting… A girl came in with a gun and began to shoot the guy that killed her mother. She got carried away and began shooting everything in sight… She shot a friend, Sister Peg, and I had to stop her. I… I shot her and… and… it killed her. I killed her."

"But dad, you saved several other lives!" Dickie argues. "What if she…" he stops himself from talking.

"What if she, what?" he wants his son to continue.

"What if she shot Liv?"

And there it is. That very question has been in his head ever since the shooting. What if Jenna did shoot her? He wouldn't be able to live with himself if that were to happen, knowing that he could have done something to prevent it.

"I know…" he whispers. "But the guilt eats me alive… She had a whole future ahead of her and I took it away," He closes his eyes to prevent himself from crying, "Like that," he snaps his fingers quickly.

Dickie sighs, "Well, I'm not going to say I'm glad she's dead, but I'm glad you stopped her from possibly hurting Liv… because if she got shot, and God forbid, killed her – Nickolas and Leah wouldn't even be here and have an amazing woman as their mother…"

"WHAT?"

"You haven't seen her?" Dickie asks.

"No! She had kids?"

"Well… yeah… Nickolas is three and Leah is one."

"How did this happen?"

Dickie chuckles, "Well, you see, dad, it all started when a man and a woman –."

"I know _how_ it happened. But… But…"

"She got married, dad."

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><p><strong>AN: Dun. Dun. Dun. Yes, I did it. **

**Up next (if you want me to continue) : Olivia comes into the story and we meet her family! Will she run into Elliot? Does she still work at Special Victims? Are Nick and Amanda going to make to make an appearance? Will Elliot be returning to SVU or is he still not ready for that yet?**

***works on chapter two* **

**Review! You know you want to (: **


	2. Chapter 2

**Five Years Later: Chapter Two **

**A/N: I like making Kathy nice and not a bitchy, psychotic ex-wife. By the way, thanks to all those that took their time to review (loved it), favorite, and follow this story(: **

**Summary: It has been five years since Elliot left Special Victims. Now, all of a sudden he returns to New York and sees that everyone has moved on with their lives, but him. How will he deal with everything he is about to find out?**

"_I know…" he whispers. "But the guilt eats me alive… She had a whole future ahead of her and I took it away," He closes his eyes to prevent himself from crying, "Like that," he snaps his fingers quickly._

_Dickie sighs, "Well, I'm not going to say I'm glad she's dead, but I'm glad you stopped her from possibly hurting Liv… because if she got shot, and God forbid, killed her – Nickolas and Leah wouldn't even be here and have an amazing woman as their mother…" _

"_WHAT?" _

"_You haven't seen her?" Dickie asks. _

"_No! She had kids?" _

"_Well… yeah… Nickolas is three and Leah is one." _

"_How did this happen?" _

_Dickie chuckles, "Well, you see, dad, it all started when a man and a woman –." _

"_I know how it happened. But… But…" _

"_She got married, dad." _

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><p>He is pretty damn sure he misheard his son, Dickie – Richard. Olivia Benson is married and had two kids? Of course, he didn't think exactly expect her to be single for the rest of her life, and she deserved to be happy. <em>Maybe if I hadn't left…. Maybe Olivia and I would be together…. Or maybe not.<em>

"You probably wouldn't have had the damn guts to leave mom… well, not in that way." Elliot can tell he and Dickie aren't exactly in the best terms yet. "Dad, all's I'm saying is, that if that shooting hadn't had happened then you would still be with mom and denying your feelings for Olivia."

Elliot cannot argue with the young man because he is absolutely right. If that shooting had not have happened, then Elliot would still be with Kathy, desperately trying to fix a failing marriage. "I guess I was saying my thoughts out loud, huh?" he chuckles lightly. "But you're right."

"I always am." Dickie smirks.

"Like father, like son – arrogant." Kathy points out from the back door. The men chuckle and Kathy sits down beside Elliot. "I always knew you had feelings for Olivia, but I was always in denial. A few weeks before you left – before the shooting – I was going to discuss divorce with you but something seemed a little off about you. Olivia told me the case you guys were working on was tough – I probably wouldn't understand – Then one day you come home and drop the papers on my lap and leave. I figure that was a couple days after the shooting," she pauses, "I thought you were leaving me for Olivia… So, I signed them and let you leave. I… I thought you would come back for your things and to see your kids, but you never came." She whispers the last part.

Elliot is just about to apologize again but what good will that be? How will "I'm sorry" fix anything? He sighs and buries his face in the palms of his hands. "So… I'm guessing everyone is happy now?" he asks after bringing his head up to look at Kathy then at Dickie.

Mother and son shrug their shoulders. "You could say that, I guess. Elliot, don't think no one misses you because we all do," she rubs his back in a friendly way, "That includes Olivia, I'm sure." She smiles at her ex-husband. "She, uh, is coming over with her family for dinner tomorrow night." She informs him. His head snaps back up to look at her, "Yeah. We got pretty close, you could say."

"Really?" Elliot asks. He was pretty sure that a few years back Kathy was always complaining about him spending more time with Olivia. She even had the nerve to accuse him of cheating on her with his "office wife". Yeah, sure, Kath. But she is over it now, he sees. "How close?"

"To the point where I became one of the Bride's Maid for her wedding?"

"Oh, yeah! Mom looked great in that dress! And Liv looked absolutely stunning!" Dickie exclaims.

"Wow… Kathy this doesn't bother you?"

"Should it? Should I be one of those crazy, jealous ex-wives? Elliot, I love you. I really do but not like I used to. You're really full of yourself. Dickie gets that from you." She smiles at him.

"Richard!" Dickie sighs.

Both adults laugh. Turning to look at Kathy, he says, "That's something I definitely wouldn't want." He nods when she tells him she loves him. "You know I will always love you. You were my first love and you gave me five beautiful children. Thank you." He smiles.

"I guess that's why we were brought together, Elliot," she begins, "to bring these five beautiful children into this world."

"I guess so." He smiles at her.

"Dad, where are you staying?" Dickie asks.

Elliot rubs the back of his neck, "Uh… I was going to check into a hotel after I leave here." He replies, shrugging one shoulder.

"Nonsense, Elliot, as a friend, I'll let you stay in the guest room for as long as you need." Kathy tells him.

"I-I don't know…"

"Dad, please? It'd be great for Eli!"

Elliot nods, defeated. "Okay, okay. Thanks, Kathy. This means a lot." Their blue eyes stare at each other for a while. He is glad that his ex-wife and he are able to maintain a healthy relationship.

The night goes on with Elliot spending time with Eli, Dickie, and he even wants to get to know Dillon. Eli is happy that his father is back, and Dickie loves having guy conversation; He receives advice from Elliot. Dillon appreciates Elliot trying to get to know him. He remembers when the house was overrun by the women when Lizzie, Maureen and Kathleen were around. Now it is just Kathy. But she loves them anyway. Later in the evening, after Eli and Dillon had gone to bed, Dickie and Kathy help Elliot settle in the guest room. He really is grateful for everything Kathy is doing.

* * *

><p>Her life changed a lot when Elliot left and at first, she didn't want to give up. She always thought he would come back in a month or two, but day-after-day she began to lose hope. She moved on with her life after her little break-down. Trevor Langan asked her out on a date, and at first she had refused. He continued to ask her out, telling her that he really liked her and that he really wanted to get to know her better. She agreed just to shut him up, but not once did she think she would actually enjoy herself spending time with him. Yes, she always found the man highly attractive, but she had compared Elliot to him in the past that she just couldn't be with him. She loved Elliot for majority of the years as partners, and then he just walks away. Without a word. He had taken a part of her with him, and he still has it.<p>

She came to the realization that he wasn't coming back a while back. She wished that her best friend was at her wedding, though, she was sure that wedding probably wouldn't have happened if he was still there. Don't get her wrong, she loves Trevor, but her love for him would never compare to what she felt for Elliot years ago.

Now, it is five years later, and she moved on happily. She has the family she has always wanted and her husband that was amazing. Wink, wink. She just wonders why he just walked out of everybody's lives – his family especially. How could he just walk out on them? Eli needed his father as did his older children – Dickie for example. She and Kathy have become incredibly good friends lately which is quite odd in away. It is funny how losing the one thing they had in common brought them closer.

She leans against her husband, his arm around her shoulders and her arm around his waist as they watch their three-year old son Nickolas Joseph run around with their new Golden Retriever puppy at the park. It is a beautiful day – clear skies. No cloud in sight. The sun is up and shining. It was just perfect. They had their one-year old daughter, Leah Grace, sleeping in her stroller.

"We're still going over to Kathy's for dinner, right?" Olivia asks Trevor, running a hand over his chest. He nods as he continues to watch their son play with their young dog. He is a beautiful little boy. He looked a lot like Olivia with his big brown eyes and dark hair. He has her stubbornness and temper as well. It's cute, they both think.

Both parents watch as their three-year old son falls back when he bumped into young boy with older people with him. The puppy stops dead in its tracks, watching his owner and the strangers. Nickolas has a smile creep up on his adorable little face. Trevor is about to go over there when he realizes who it is.

"ELI!" Nickolas squeals. He has always been close to Eli. Eli has always treated him as a younger brother. He loves that "big brother" feeling though he isn't his brother, but he just loves the little boy and girl so much.

Right as Olivia and Trevor are going to get up, they are stopped by another person, Nick Amaro. "Hey, Nick." Olivia smiles at her current partner. Today is their day off from work and apparently he is out here with his family like she is. His wife is back from Iraq and they are spending as much time together as possible. "Hey, Zara." She then greets Nick's wife as does Trevor.

On the other side, where Nickolas was at, Elliot looks down at the toddler as he talks away with Dickie, Dillon, and Eli. He looks over at Kathy and her current boyfriend, "Who is he?" he asks them. He met Liam earlier that morning when he stopped by. He is a good guy and they immediately got along. Who would have known?

"That's Olivia's son, Nickolas." Kathy says as she looks around the park for the boy's parents. She shields her eyes, with her hand, from the sun as she scans the park, her eyes then landing on two couples. "Ah-ha." She smiles once she recognized Olivia and Trevor with their daughter.

Elliot swallows hard, "I… I don't know if I can talk to her." He looks back down at the little boy. He looks a lot like Olivia, he sees. He can also see Trevor in the boy. _I hope she's happy._

Dickie looks up and waves at Olivia while Elliot turns around before she can recognize him from a distance. "HEY LIV!" he yells across the field and she waves back.

"Dickie," Elliot whisper-yells at Dickie, "not now! Wait till I'm at a good distance." He begins to speed walk away when he hears Eli call after him.

"Dad, where are you going?" Eli watches as Elliot turns around to look into his blue eyes. "Why are you leaving?"

"I'm not leaving, son." He kneels down and gives Eli a hug before walking back over to Kathy. He sees Olivia walking away from another couple with Trevor who is pushing a stroller. He looks over at Kathy, "I'm not even sure what to say to her after five long years, Kath." He sighs, "Everything is different." He's nervous, everyone can tell. He pulls on his shirt collar and doesn't know what to do with his hands. She still looks amazing as always, he thinks. Trevor is one lucky guy.

"Hey, Kathy –" The Langans cut themselves off once their eyes land on a certain person among the four adults. "Elliot." They both say softly.

"Hey… Guys…" he is nervous, unsure what their feelings are now. Well, honestly, he can care less about Trevor's feelings. All he cares about is how his best friend feels for him after he disappeared for five years without contact. Except that once when mailed her his Semper Fidelis. It had not return address, but he just wanted to send her something after ten months. He notices that she is wearing the necklace, and he likes that.

Olivia is blinking; wanting to make sure this isn't just a figment of her imagination. It happens every now and then but it's really rare now than compared to the first year. "I… I can't believe this." She shakes her head and takes Trevor's hand for a little support. "Elliot?"

Elliot nods slowly, "I'm back." He says softly, keeping his eyes one hers, and Trevor puts his arm around her waist protectively. He wants Elliot to know that Olivia is his now – that Elliot lost his chance a while back. Elliot now realizes how short Olivia is compared to him when she isn't wearing heels. She barely went up to Trevor's shoulder. He looks at Trevor, "I'd really appreciate if I can talk to your wife privately for a few minutes."

Trevor glances down at Olivia who is just staring at one of the many blades of grass by their feet. He looks back at Elliot, "Since you're Catholic, I don't see why not." He drops his arm. Olivia refuses to move from her spot.

"Liv?"

"Don't call me that," she snaps. "Come on, Elliot." She finally straightens up her posture and begins to walk away from the others, knowing Elliot will follow her.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Up next a conversation between Elliot and Olivia. Will she still go over to Kathy's for dinner, knowing that Elliot is likely to be there? Will Elliot be able to get his best friend back or will Olivia refuse to let him in her life again? ****Can they go back to being Benson and Stabler? Will Elliot go back to the unit? And… ****The tables are turned now**** as you can tell****. Elliot is single and Olivia is married! (: ****As for Nickolas – Just picture Mariska and Peter's son, August.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Five Years Later: Chapter Three **

**A/N: Thanks again for the reviews and those who ''favorite'' and follow this story! (: **

**Summary: It has been five years since Elliot left Special Victims. Now, all of a sudden he returns to New York and sees that everyone has moved on with their lives, but him. How will he deal with everything he is about to find out?**

* * *

><p><em>Elliot nods slowly, "I'm back." He says softly, keeping his eyes one hers, and Trevor puts his arm around her waist protectively. He wants Elliot to know that Olivia is his now – that Elliot lost his chance a while back. Elliot now realizes how short Olivia is compared to him when she isn't wearing heels. She barely went up to Trevor's shoulder. He looks at Trevor, "I'd really appreciate if I can talk to your wife privately for a few minutes." <em>

_Trevor glances down at Olivia who is just staring at one of the many blades of grass by their feet. He looks back at Elliot, "Since you're Catholic, I don't see why not." He drops his arm. Olivia refuses to move from her spot. _

"_Liv?" _

"_Don't call me that," she snaps. "Come on, Elliot." She finally straightens up her posture and begins to walk away from the others, knowing Elliot will follow her._

Olivia doesn't know what to do or feel. She is happy that Elliot is back but then again, she is angry that he had taken off without as much as a goodbye and then he decides to come back all of a sudden. Some nerve this man has.

She is furious, but she wants to give him one of the biggest and tightest hugs ever and tell him everything that has happened in the last five years. She wants to tell him how much she's missed him; how much she had worried about him; what a mess she was when he left… Anger beats all that, though.

Olivia turns around and sees Elliot tugging on his shirt's collar. She narrows her eyes at him and crosses her arms over her chest. He just stands there with his hands either in or out of his jean's pockets. He is nervous, she concludes in her head. She's known him for so long that she knew his habits – good and bad.

She raises her eyebrow at the man she once considered her best friend; the only person she trusted with her life; the only person that knew her better than she knew herself. She swallows hard, trying to remain strong and not break down and throw her arms around him. "Well, Elliot, I know there is something you need to tell me since you asked for Trevor's permission to talk to me… Not like you exactly needed it." It was true. She didn't let a single man order her around – husband or not.

Elliot lets out the breath he had no idea he was holding. He finally leaves his hands in his pockets and fixes his posture, standing up straighter. "I'm just really sorry –."

Olivia laughs sarcastically and shakes her head in disbelief, "Sorry?"

"Olivia, just hear me out, okay?" he practically begs.

She nods and as she waits for him to speak, she looks over his shoulder to check on the others. Leah had awakened and is playing with Dickie – she adores that young man – and Nickolas is playing with Eli, Dillon, and their puppy, Buddy. Trevor was talking to Kathy and Liam. Two questions go through her head: How long has Elliot exactly been back? How long has Kathy known?

"Do mind if we walk and talk? Please?"

Olivia takes out her cellphone and texts Trevor that she is going for a walk with Elliot just to hear him out. In seconds her phone made a sound indicating she had a message. She reads it; it was a one-word text "okay". She looks at Trevor and smiles at him, and he nods.

"All right, Elliot." She says and begins to walk. He is at a reasonable distance from her as they walk alongside each other. "Tell me whatever you need to tell me, Elliot."

"I know you're mad – No, don't say anything." He doesn't look at her but ahead. His eyes were fixed on a tree that was far away. "I feel like complete crap for leaving the way I did, but you have to understand it was rough for me to go back to the place where I killed a teenage girl. Elizabeth was in my mind as she died in my arms… Jenna wasn't that much older than Elizabeth," he pauses and closes his eyes for a second, "I took her life away, Olivia. I couldn't walk into the squad room without thinking about the shooting that had taken place."

Sighing, he continues before she can respond, "My therapist told me it wasn't my fault. I'm trying to convince myself that, but I can't help but feel like I chose…" He breaths in and swallows back a sob. He can't break down. Not now. And he can't finish what he was about to say. It wasn't something she didn't need to know. Well, not now at the lease. He glances over at Olivia before looking straight ahead again, "I _killed_ her. Why didn't I shoot her in the arm or leg where I was _supposed_ to?" he panicked that day and did the first thing that came to mind without thinking twice about it. He waits for her to say something and as he waits, he thinks about his reason – what had caused him to react the way he did. Yeah, it was best for him not to mention it to her just yet.

"But you were gone for _five_ years, Elliot." She reminds him. Though she knew that he did the shooting, and not her, it was still difficult for her. She had a few nightmares at first, too. But she didn't know what he was feeling or going on his head. "I understand you needed time, but it wouldn't have killed you to call one of us." She passes a hand through her brown locks without looking at him.

Elliot laughs sadly, "That's because I couldn't! If I did, then it would just bring me back here, and I wasn't ready to do that. I know I was – am a coward for running away like that and leaving my kids… and… and you." He says softly and doesn't make eyes contact with her. She is a happily married woman, he keeps reminding himself as they walk. She is no longer that single cop that he had left behind. No, she is married. They were best friends for a good twelve years and that is a friendship he would like to have once again, but he knew it is going to take a hell of a long time if she even lets him back in her life.

"When did you come back?"

"I came back last night."

"A lot has happened since you left…" she informs him. "Munch is Captain of the squad, and Cragen took Tucker's place –." She is cut off by him.

"I know."

How? He just said he returned last night, and he knows Cragen is in charge of Internal Affairs and that Munch is captain?

"I, uh, I stopped by the precinct last night… I want to come back, but I wanted to talk to Cragen first," he chuckles, "I was pretty surprised to find it practically empty and that Munch was sitting in the office." He had stopped by the precinct an hour before showing up at Kathy's front door. "I have to take the exam again, and if I pass, I can, uh, come back." He rubs the back of his neck once they stop in front of the water fountain.

"Oh…" is all that leaves her mouth. "This is just so hard to warp my head around, ya know? I mean, you were gone for five years, and the last thing I ever heard from you was ten months after you left, which was this necklace." She touches the Semper Fidelis necklace and then looks up at him. Their eyes meet finally. "I'm angry, yes, but I did miss you, Elliot." She sighs and drops her hand to her side. "We all did."

Elliot nods and looks down at his watch, "There's still a few more things that I need to tell you but here isn't the best place, Liv – Olivia." He corrects himself. "Whenever you can, let's grab a cup of coffee or something and catch up." He doesn't meet her eyes when he says that. "Please? I can see there is so much I missed." He turns slightly to his left to look back at the very small figures at a very far distance.

"I… We'll see, Elliot." She crosses her arms over her chest.

"Wanna head back?"

She nods, "Yeah."

The two begin to walk back to the others in a comfortable silence. Though she is angry with him still, she is happy that he spoke to her about this. She knows that there is a lot left to be said, but this was better than nothing. She just wonders what work will hold for them. What will Trevor say to her when they're alone? How will the others, other than Munch, react?

Elliot knows that his return wasn't going to be easy for anyone, but so far he is happy with what had turned out. Hopefully, the others will react about the same, too. Though, he highly doubts it.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Next – Trevor and Olivia at home. Will they go to dinner or will they come up with some excuse not to? Then it's off to work! Will they sit down anytime soon and catch up like Elliot wants to? Is everything all right between the former partners? **

**I have some idea… Review:) **


	4. Chapter 4

**Five Years Later: Chapter Four **

**A/N: Thanks again for the reviews and those who "favorite" and follow this story! (: So… I see you guys no like-y Trevor D: He's… sweet… but not Elliot. I get it. :] By the way, I should be doing my Chemistry and English homework… Guess I'd much rather do this.**

**Also, since I stayed home from school today, I decided to finish this chapter but instead of helping my mom around the house, like I'm supposed to… Enjoy.**

_Elliot nods and looks down at his watch, "There's still a few more things that I need to tell you but here isn't the best place, Liv – Olivia." He corrects himself. "Whenever you can, let's grab a cup of coffee or something and catch up." He doesn't meet her eyes when he says that. "Please? I can see there is so much I missed." He turns slightly to his left to look back at the very small figures at a very far distance. _

"_I… We'll see, Elliot." She crosses her arms over her chest. _

"_Wanna head back?" _

_She nods, "Yeah." _

_The two begin to walk back to the others in a comfortable silence. Though she is angry with him still, she is happy that he spoke to her about this. She knows that there is a lot left to be said, but this was better than nothing. She just wonders what work will hold for them. What will Trevor say to her when they're alone? How will the others, other than Munch, react? _

_Elliot knows that his return wasn't going to be easy for anyone, but so far he is happy with what had turned out. Hopefully, the others will react about the same, too. Though, he highly doubts it. _

* * *

><p>"It's rude to cancel, Trevor," Olivia tells him once they walk through the front door to their house. Trevor had told her to call Kathy and tell her they can't make it tonight. "Especially at the very last minute." She takes Leah out from her stroller and to her nursery to change her diaper.<p>

Trevor walks in with Nickolas balanced on his hip. "I'm sure she'll understand if we tell her something came up." He insists.

Olivia shakes her head as she fixes the fourteen month old baby's pants, "But nothing came up! They're going to know we made up some excuse not to go because Elliot's back and going to be there." She argues and balances the infant on her hip then runs her fingers through her little boy's brown hair and kisses his cheek. "I love you, Nicky." she smiles at him.

Nicky smiles at his mother and rests his head on his father's shoulder before squirming in Trevor's arms to let him down. Once he is let go, he runs out the room and into his bedroom to play with his building blocks.

Trevor shoves his hands into his pockets and continues, "It's going to be extremely awkward, don't you think? I mean, isn't it already awkward enough for him? He's sitting at a table with his _ex-wife _and her current _boyfriend_. And on top of that, we're going to be sitting there! You and I were both single when he left, and now we're married with children – a big change! Oh, and he's never been my biggest fan." He tried harder. Everything he says is true but those are not exactly the reasons why he didn't want to go.

They head to their bedroom with Leah, who Olivia then sets down on the bed. The infant crawls to the center of the bed and plays with a toy she had left earlier there. Olivia sits down on the edge of her bed and looks up at her six foot, five inch tall husband. "Well, Trev, remember I didn't like you either, but you ended up growing on me." She half shrugs, "But I guess I get what you mean… I'm just not so sure." She stands up and walks over to Trevor and wraps her arms around his waist and gets on her tippy toes to give him a kiss upon the lips.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

* * *

><p>"Oh, no, no. No, no, I completely understand. Maybe some other night… Oh, yeah. Don't worr… Don't apologize. I said: I understand, Liv. All right, good bye, Liv. Take care." Kathy sighs and hangs up the phone. She turns around and sees Elliot hanging by the door.<p>

"Sorry about that, Kath." He apologizes. "It's me, I know." He forces a small smile that doesn't quite reach his blue eyes. "I, uh, I'll see you later." he turns the door knob when Kathy stops him from opening it.

"Elliot, I'm pretty sure it isn't you." But she knows otherwise.

Elliot shakes his head, "She – They need time. All of you do, and I completely understand. I never really expected you all to take me in with open arms… I'm kind of surprised you kind of did… But I know this is hard for you. I mean, I did walk out on you, leaving five kids. Three which were minors." He looks down at his hand that is on the door knob before looking back up at Kathy, "I'm just going for a walk, and then I'm taking a cab to the 1-6 to get my job back." He smiles at her pulls the door open. "I might head out to the bar, too."

With his hands in his pockets, he walks down the sidewalk, taking in the changes of the neighborhood he used to live in. After five years, he did expect new people. He smiles at some of the neighbors and had a small chat with a man that had a son around Dickie's age. The two men would take Dickie and the man's son, Ray, out to baseball games, fish, or bowl a few time but sometimes those plans had to be cancelled because Elliot's job.

The fresh air is clearing his head, ad he thinks a little harder. He wonders if having him stay in the guest room is awkward for Kathy. Not in the I-Want-Him-To-Sleep-In-My-Bed-But-Can't-Because-He-Is-My-Ex Husband-And-I'm-Dating-Someone awkward, but the I'm-Letting-My-Ex Husband-Who-I-Hadn't-Seen-In-Five-Years-Stay-In-My-Guest-Room awkward.

Elliot doesn't want to be a burden there, and since he just decided that he is going to stay in the city, he will need to find an apartment. He has enough untouched money in the bank. Back in Utah, he would have part-time jobs, but he was only paid in cash as he requested. The jobs he would do were horrible but how much did he have to choose from in the really small city he stayed in? Hell, it was so small almost everyone knew each other! The population of Altamont, Utah, isn't very high...

Elliot hails for a cab after walking around for about a good twenty minutes. He gives the cab driver the address of the precinct. He leans back against the seat and closes his eyes just for a second….

"Sir," the cab driver says, looking at Elliot through the rear-view mirror. He notices that Elliot doesn't stir. "Sir," his Indian accent sounds much clearer as he raises his voice. He hears a groan. "Sir, we are here at your destination." He sounds a little irritated as he says that.

Elliot's eyes snap open, and he quickly reaches into his pocket to retrieve his wallet and pays the fare and giving the driver a tip.

Elliot gets out the yellow vehicle and looks up at the building. He was there the day before, but he just can't prevent the strange feeling in his stomach from happening. He doesn't know why he is nervous. Maybe it is because he is worried as to who may be inside. He knows that Olivia isn't in there.

His hand finds its way to the handle and pulls the door open. He sees the old faces he'd seen every day for majority of the years he's been in SVU that he didn't see the day before.

"Detective Stabler," a voice he recognizes calls after him after Elliot presses the button with the arrow pointing up for the elevator.

Elliot turns around slowly and faces his former boss, and the man he saw as a father.

"I'm no longer a detective, Don." Elliot states the obvious.

"No, not yet, but you soon will after the exam that I am sure you will pass." Sergeant Don Cragen smiles at the younger man. "Munch told me you dropped by yesterday." Cragen tells Elliot as they step onto the elevator. "I'm glad your back and I hope you feel much better – Five years is a long time."

Elliot smiles back at the older man. "Yeah, but I regret staying away that long, you know? I don't know why I was away for so long," he chuckles sadly, "I think I was fine by the second year… I just couldn't come back and face everyone… I guess I just feared of what people may think of me knowing that I killed a teenage girl. I guess I thought that if I stayed away, then I'd learn to move on and forget the past." The elevator dings, indicating that they have reached the fourth floor and both men step out.

Elliot sighs and stares at the closed doors of the bullpen before looking back at Cragen. "I want to take that exam soon. I'm coming back… I'm apparently useless as an assistant in some Kindergarten class." He shrugs with a smile. "What can I say? Children fear me."

"Is tomorrow good enough?" Cragen asks Elliot as they begin to walk towards the doors. Elliot pulls the door open and lets Cragen go in first before following him.

"Perfect, Cap – Don." He corrects himself and looks around the squad room. He still hasn't grown used to the fact at how much different this place looked. Yesterday, he was surprised but he liked the changes.

A Hispanic detective walks over to them and greets Cragen. "Hey, Don. It's good to see you again." He tells Cragen.

"It's good to see you, too, Detective Amaro. Where's Rollins?"

"She and Fin left about an hour ago to pick up a suspect."

Cragen nods and glances over at Elliot, "Amaro, this is Elliot Stabler – Liv's former partner."

Amaro holds out his hand, and Elliot shakes it. "It's a pleasure to meet one of the best detectives to have ever have worked in the unit."

"Stabler, this is Liv's partner of five years, Detective Nick Amaro."

"I hope you have her back like I used to." Elliot lets go of the man's hand before looking over to the captain's door. "Is Munch here?"

Nick nods, "Yeah, he's in there." Nick's phone rings and he rushes over to pick it up. "Amaro."

Elliot and Cragen make their way towards Munch's office and knock before entering.

"Hey, Don… and Elliot." He leans back in his chair as the two other men sit down in the chairs across from him.

"Elliot says he'll be taking the exam tomorrow." Cragen says.

Munch nods, "That's great. Are you coming back into this unit?"

It is Elliot's turn to nod, "Yeah. I need to come back and let's face it, I was meant to be doing this – helping people… taking sick bastards off the streets." Elliot leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees, "I'd like to know who'd I'd be partnered up with when I start working here again." He's confident, like the other two, that he is definitely going to pass the exam and get his job back.

"We'll be left uneven but Ken Briscoe is transferring back, so I may pair up Fin or Rollins with him or you could work with him unless you'd much rather work with Fin… I may even consider pairing you up with Olivia, too. It'd be great to have the Dynamic Duo back."

Elliot laughs, "I don't mind… Pair me up with anyone. I just want to come back." That isn't exactly the truth. He would love to have everything back to normal… as if nothing had changed within the last five years but that's a little selfish, right? Yes, he would like that he and Liv were partners once again, but he knows well enough that she needs some time and he returning back into the state was hard for her. How will she react once she sees him sitting across from her? It is best for him to keep somewhat of a distance. All he really cares about at the moment is to get their friendship back. That's what's really important.

* * *

><p>"Liv, you okay? Usually you don't leave the kids this late with just Trevor." Alex says as her friend sits down on the bar stool. Alex brings her beer to her lips and takes a swig. "Something's wrong. Did you have a fight with Trevor?"<p>

Olivia shakes her head and calls the bartender over, getting the same thing Alex got. "No, it's just… I just can't talk to Trevor about this nor to Kathy… because it'd be really awkward considering the fact that it's about her ex-husband and…"

"Whoa! Stop right there. Wait till Casey gets here. This is definitely something we need to talk about." She closes her blue eyes chugs the rest of her beer down. Why does she need to talk about Elliot?

Just as that thought went through her mind, Casey enters the bar and notices Alex and Olivia. She goes over to them, "Hey, guys," she smiles at them then sees the expression on their faces, "what's wrong?"

"Someone, here, mentioned Elliot." Alex looks over at Olivia who chugs the rest of her beer before ordering another.

"It's been five years and you haven't mentioned that man's name in a LONG time. Why now?" Casey asks.

The chill of cool air enters the bar when the door is pushed open and Olivia looks up before looking back at Casey, "That's why."

Casey and Alex look at the direction of the door. They gasp at the sight of three men entering the bar but only one catches their blue eyes.

"Oh, my God," they whisper.

Now they understand why Olivia needed a beer so badly. The man that had left five years ago is back. Casey blinks, thinking maybe she is seeing things. Nope, she confirms, she isn't. That man is definitely taking a seat at a table with Munch and Cragen. She knows how Olivia felt about Elliot and she wonders if those feelings were still there… But she's married, she reminds herself. Olivia is married. She is probably over her feelings about Elliot. Maybe she is nervous/freaking out because the man she called her best friend is back out of the blue. Is he coming back to SVU?

You see, Casey has always had a bit of a crush on Elliot but never acted upon her feelings because he was married and she knew how Olivia felt about him. But now Olivia is married and Elliot is single.

Could this be her shot at love with Mister Elliot Stabler?

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So.. Whataya think? A little E/C maybe? Give me your opinions on that thought. Next, Rollins meets Elliot and Fin doesn't handle his return too well… And a little more of Elliot's kids… and Trevor, Nicky, and Leah if you want.:]**

**Reviews make me smile… almost as much as when I see the picture of Christopher Meloni when I turn on my computer. **


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Okay… I see that majority of you are questioning the E/O romance but trust me there will be. It's going to take some time. And I also noticed that majority of you really don't want E/C… I may do it but just temporarily just to get where I need to be… And as for O/T… expect a few, ahem, things... (Which means rating may change) [: Just tryin' to keep everyone happy. **

**Important Note: Their ages are going to be a little different (I was confusing myself the whole time):**

**Maureen – 28 (1988)**

**Kathleen – 24 (1992) **

**Dickie & Lizzie – 19 (1997)**

**Eli – 9 (2007) **

**Currently: May of 2016 **

* * *

><p><em>"Someone, here, mentioned Elliot." Alex looks over at Olivia who chugs the rest of her beer before ordering another.<em>

_"It's been five years and you haven't mentioned that man's name in a LONG time. Why now?" Casey asks._

_The chill of cool air enters the bar when the door is pushed open and Olivia looks up before looking back at Casey, "That's why."_

_Casey and Alex look at the direction of the door. They gasp at the sight of three men entering the bar but only one catches their blue eyes._

_"Oh, my God," they whisper. _

_Now they understand why Olivia needed a beer so badly. The man that had left five years ago is back. Casey blinks, thinking maybe she is seeing things. Nope, she confirms, she isn't. That man is definitely taking a seat at a table with Munch and Cragen. She knows how Olivia felt about Elliot and she wonders if those feelings were still there… But she's married, she reminds herself. Olivia is married. She is probably over her feelings about Elliot. Maybe she is nervous/freaking out because the man she called her best friend is back out of the blue. Is he coming back to SVU?_

_You see, Casey has always had a bit of a crush on Elliot but never acted upon her feelings because he was married and she knew how Olivia felt about him. But now Olivia is married and Elliot is single._

_Could this be her shot at love with Mister Elliot Stabler?_

"Wow… That's, uh…" Alex can't find the words to use as she stares at the man that has been gone for five years. This has to be a bit awkward for Olivia and Kathy, and maybe even Casey because only she knows about that crush she has had on Elliot since she started working at Special Victims. But she knows that Olivia has loved Elliot since, like, day one. What is going through their heads at this moment?

Olivia looks away from Elliot Stabler and turns her attention back to her drink. "Case?" she looks at Casey who is yet to take her eyes off the men who haven't noticed them yet. "Casey." she says louder. She still fails to answer; her eyes remain on the three men. "Casey Marie Novak."

Casey quickly looks back at Olivia and says, sounding annoyed, "What?" the blond folds her arms over her chest and takes a seat on the stool next to her.

"She was trying to get your attention for, like, the last two minutes. You were burning a hole through Elliot's head." Alex jerks her head slightly in Elliot's direction.

"Sorry," she blushes, "it's just… it's hard seeing him after five years, ya know?"

"I know…" Olivia agrees. She pushes her beer bottle away and calls over the bartender, "I need something strong…er." She then turns her back on the young man and faces her friends. "Okay, this is really hard… I don't know if I should be happy that's he's back or pissed off."

"Both?" Casey suggests. "When did you first see him again?"

The bartender returns to Olivia with something strong and she throws it back, then clears her throat from the burning in her throat. It has been a while since she actually had something strong to drink. Since she got pregnant Nicky, she never drank again unless it was that occasional beer with Trevor at home. She honestly can't remember the last time she entered a bar. From work to her kids, she doesn't have much time to have a girl's night out.

Olivia sets the glass down and shifts to her left to look at Casey, "Earlier today when I was at the park with Trevor and the kids. Nicky was running around playing with Buddy and he bumped into Eli. We go over, you know to have a conversation with Kathy and Liam which is when we see Elliot." She sighs and brushes off the imaginary lint off her pants. "We talked… Not much really but he wants us to catch up so a cup of coffee maybe some time in a couple of days or weeks even…"

"So he was with Kathy and Liam?"

Olivia nods, "We were supposed to go over to Kathy's for dinner but Trevor insisted that we cancel because 'something came up'. It was just an excuse of his because 'things are already too awkward for Elliot'." She rolls her eyes. "I didn't want to argue with him… If Elliot sees me here, then he'll know I lied. Nothing came up; it was just an excuse. I feel pretty bad." She runs her hand through her dark hair.

"Is he…?" Alex trails off, knowing that Olivia knows what she means.

Olivia nods once more, "Yeah… He says he needs to take the exam again and then he can come back if he passes." She has seemed to find something interesting in her fingers because she can't take her eyes off them as she speaks.

Sighing, she continues, "I just can wrap my head around it. First it was my family and me living happily without Elliot coming into mind once and then, _poof_; he's back… the look in Trevor's eyes after we left… He was being a little possessive and, I'm not sure, I think he was jealous."

"But he has nothing to be jealous about, right?" Casey asks.

Olivia shakes her head. "All Elliot really wants to do is get that friendship we used to have back… I'm married and I know he respects that. I love my husband, guys, don't doubt that. We were never anything more than just friends and partners even if I loved him then. Things change."

"So… You don't love him anymore?" Casey asks as if she was trying to confirm something.

* * *

><p>"First round is on me. Soda, Don?" he knows that Cragen doesn't drink but still feels the need to asks the former captain. Once Cragen nods and returns to his conversation with Elliot, Munch makes his way to get the drinks when he notices Alex, Casey, and Olivia. He approaches the three women, "How are you fine ladies doing tonight?" he smiles at them.<p>

"Hey, Munch." They all say.

"Ya know, Stabler's back."

They nod, "Yep. We saw him with you and Cragen." Casey says then takes a swig of her beer.

"We might be seeing him back at work soon so I'd say we try to remember how to cope with his temper." He looks back at the other two men whom are awaiting their drinks before looking back at the three women, "See you all at work tomorrow." He bows his head slightly before walking off.

He grabs the drinks and takes them back to the booth he was sitting at with the other two men. He gives Cragen his soda and Elliot a beer. "You two won't believe who I just saw."

"Let me guess," Cragen stops him from telling them who and plays with the rim of the soda can, "Benson, Cabot, and Novak." With that said he takes a sip of his Pepsi and looks to the direction Munch came from and sees two blonds and a brunette deep in conversation.

"How'd you…?"

"Other than Fin, Rollins, Amaro, Elliot, and me, they are the only other people in your life that we know of."

Elliot stares down at his drink, "Is this weird to any of you?"

"Seeing those women here? For Olivia a little, I guess because she hasn't really hung out at the bar since she had little Nicky. Have you seen him and Leah, Trevor and Olivia's daughter?" Munch smiles at the thought of his "nephew and niece". They were probably the cutest children ever. Olivia and Trevor did well.

"Not exactly to what I was referring to, but to answer your question, yes, I have. At the park earlier today, I was out with Kathy, her boyfriend, and the three boys when I ran into… uh, Nicky." He sighs and lifts the glass bottle to lips and tilts it upward, drinking one third of the alcohol. "I was talking about me," he points at himself, "being back."

"Oh." Munch shrugs. "I don't mind. I actually like having you around, Stabler."

Cragen shakes his head, "It's going to take some time getting used to, but I'm glad you're back, Elliot." His eyes make their way over to the women, "As for them, especially Olivia, and your family, I can't really speak for. You did leave without saying a word or a note of some kind. We tried to reach for you but nada. Don't feel bad, son, give them a little time."

Elliot smiles up at Cragen who was much like a father.

"Thanks, Don." He finally looks over at Alex, Casey, and Olivia. "I think I might go over there… Say hi to Casey and Alex for the first time in five years and maybe talk to Olivia for a bit if she'll let me."

The older men nod and Munch scoots out to let Elliot out the boot before sitting back down to talk to Cragen.

Elliot walks over to them, "Casey, Ale…"

He is cut off by Casey throwing her thin arms around him.

"Uh, I missed you… too?" he hesitates to return the embrace but does. Casey holds on longer than necessary. Elliot drops his arms and Casey takes it as a clue that it is time to let go of the man.

"Oh, sorry… I mean, it's great to see you, Elliot." She looks down and finds something rather intriguing on the floor of the bar – a black dot. Her strawberry blond hair falls over her face, covering the fact that she is, indeed, blushing.

Elliot smiles at her before turning his attention to Alex who gives him one of those awkward one arm hugs that usually pisses off a girl. He awkwardly smiles over at Olivia and out of nowhere he hears Alex exclaim,

"Oh, look at the time!" she stares down at her watch-less wrist and looks back up at the others, "Casey and I have court in the morning… And you two need to talk, right Olivia?"

"But tomorrow is…"

Casey is cut off by Alex taking her by the forearm and dragging her towards the front of the bar where the exit was at. Alex shouts a "goodbye" and in seconds both blonds were gone, out into the late May night.

"They don't have court tomorrow." Olivia clarifies with a sigh. "Sit down, El."

And there was that nickname he loved hearing from her.

"Thinking about catching up before you come back to SVU?" she rests her elbows on the bar with a glass in her hands as she glances over at him when he takes the vacant seat next to her that used to be where Casey sat.

"That'd be lovely." He calls the bartender over and orders a beer. "So… You and Trevor, huh?" he questions.

She nods.

"And you two have two kids?"

She nods again.

"They're beautiful children, Liv. I'm glad you finally became a mother. I haven't seen you parent, but I know you're good," Elliot half-smiles at Olivia.

"Thanks. What about you? What have you been doing in the last five years?"

"Nothing, really, I just spend my time working part-time jobs in Utah. I hated it." He shakes his head at the previous jobs he had done. "I missed the big city… I'm here in the city where I belong…" he runs a hand over his face. "I see you're still wearing the necklace." He points out with his eyes.

Olivia's hand goes to the Semper Fidelis. She holds it between her thumb and forefinger, "Yeah. Elliot, no matter what a part of me knew we were always going to remain faithful to one another as friends. I know you may think you lost me, but you really never did. I'm always going to be your friend… Even if I kept denying it to myself." She whispers. "I'm just hurt that you were able to walk away from a twelve year partnership and friendship… And I'm hurt for Kathy. You two were together for twenty-something years. How can you walk away from that?"

"Liv – Can I call you that?"

"Elliot, you can call me whatever the hell you want except Livvy." They share a short laugh before it got serious once again.

"It was never my intention to hurt anyone, Liv. It was just so hard for me."

There is silence between them.

"Elliot, remember when we first started working together?" she asks him, breaking the silence, before taking a sip from her drink.

Elliot nods and smiles at the memory of when Olivia first walked into the squad room seventeen years ago. She was so determined to help out the victims and take off the perpetrators off the streets. He knew that in some way that that woman was going to change his life… Within weeks they were known as the Dynamic Duo, Benson and Stabler, or Stabler and Benson just because he wanted it that way.

"I could never forget. March twenty-second, nineteen ninety-nine." He turns his head slightly to make eye contact with her, "Why?"

"That first year – my first year – I slept with Cassidy, remember?"

He groans, "Don't remind me, of all people, him?"

She shudders, "I was young back then, Elliot," she sighs with a small smile forming on her lips, "we stood by the lockers and you told me something that I'd never forget."

"'I'm you're partner, for better or worse.'" He whispers to himself and looks down as he remembers that conversation he had with her seventeen years ago. "I'm really sorry, Liv." He says softly.

"So much for worse, huh?" she laughs sarcastically as she finishes her drink, thinking that it is enough for tonight.

"I know… it's just… I can't really explain it. It was too much for me to handle anymore. I needed to go away and that involved me leaving those I love… I regret it, trust me, I really do." He shakes his head at himself, "I'm sure there were better ways to fix this but what is done is done and I can't change that."

She is just about to say something when her phone goes off. She takes it out from her purse and sees a text message from Trevor. She taps the screen, opening the message, and reads it.

_Babe, Nicky won't stop asking for you. He says he won't go to bed unless you're here, and you know me… :) _

"Trevor was never one to go against that boy's wishes…" she mumbles to herself as she replies a quick "okay" and puts the device away. She looks up at Elliot and gives him an apologetic smile, "Sorry, Nicky is being his stubborn self. I have to go."

"That's cute. He has your personality."

He flashes her one of those grins that she missed so much. It is good to have him back, she admits in her head.

"I'll see you soon." She tells him with one last wave and is out the door.

An hour later, Elliot returns to Kathy's to find the lights still on. He pulls out his cellphone and looks at the time.

_**11:47**_

He then notices two other vehicles parked in front of the house so he figures Kathy has some visitors. He walks up the three steps and uses the key Kathy had given him in the morning. He puts the key in the lock and turns it, pushing the door in. He removes his shoes – some rule Kathy had always wanted people to follow – and walks in the direction he heard soft murmurs. He rounds the corner and hears a gasp from two people sitting there on the sofa.

He didn't expect anything more than shock and maybe anger from them both but he really hopes that they don't hate him and will forgive him… soon. He loves them and he can't bear to be hated by his own children. Dickie and Eli had forgiven him, Kathy and Olivia are on their way down that road to forgive him, but his kids are so much like him.

"When did you come back?" Kathleen Stabler doesn't sound too happy at the sight of her father. She is a beautiful woman who was the spitting image of her mother. Her arms were crossed over her chest as she leans back in the cushions of the sofa she is sitting in with her younger sister next to her.

"Last night," he informs his second eldest daughter and is then attacked by Elizabeth Stabler with a hug. Her arms tighten around his waist and she presses her face against his chest, breathing in his scent. A tear makes its way down her cheek then seconds later she breaks down completely. Elliot feels the tears seep through his blue shirt; he tightens the embrace and buries his nose in her hair, planting a kiss on the top of her head.

Kathleen bites her bottom lip hard to keep it from quivering and looks in the other direction, huffing.

"I missed you, dad." The nineteen year old finally says after pulling away from her father, wiping her tears away with the back of her hand.

His hands are at her shoulders, "I missed you, too."

"Bullshit," mutters Kathleen.

"Kat–"

"No, dad, don't explain."

"Kathleen –" he tries again but Kathleen gets up and makes her way up the stairs to check on Eli and Dillon. She knows she's acting childish but she's trying to wrap her head around the fact that her father is back after five years.

Elliot sighs and sits down with Elizabeth's arms around him.

He takes twenty minutes or so to explain the best he can as to why he had left. Elizabeth has always been a daddy's girl so she had forgiven easily.

"Daddy… Mom… I, uh, I have something to tell you." Elizabeth looks down at her hands, avoiding all eye contact with her parents. She tells Dickie to please leave, wanting to discuss a certain topic without him present and that she will tell him and their sibling later. Swallowing hard, she finally looks into her father's blue. She is on the verge of tears again because she is afraid of disappointment.

"Liz, you're scaring me. What is it?"

"I'm…."

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><p><strong>AN: This chapter was getting too long so… Fin & Rollins, Elliot returns, Elliot and Kathy's reaction to what Lizzie tells them, and The Langans. I'm still debating the E/C thing… **

**Review(: It'll keep my mind off my cousin humping my bedroom floor & Winnie the Pooh.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Happy New Years! You all have seen that video with Mariska and Harry, right? I'm so excited! **

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><p>"<em>Daddy… Mom… I, uh, I have something to tell you." Elizabeth looks down at her hands, avoiding all eye contact with her parents. She tells Dickie to please leave, wanting to discuss a certain topic without him present and that she will tell him and their sibling later. Swallowing hard, she finally looks into her father's blue. She is on the verge of tears again because she is afraid of disappointment. <em>

"_Liz, you're scaring me. What is it?" _

"_I'm…." _

He lay awake on the couch staring up at the ceiling. He thinks back to the conversation his youngest daughter had with him and Kathy… He just can't believe it.

"_I'm dropping out…" she whispers._

_Kathy cuts Lizzie off, "Honey, please, don't." _

"_Please, mommy, let me finish. I have a reason," she lets out a shaky breath and looks at her father who appears to be disappointed that she is dropping out and she knows that her reason is going to disappoint the man even more. "Be…because…" she can't look at him any longer and looks back down, "because I'm pregnant." It is just barely a whisper. _

_At first they think they have misheard Lizzie but when she doesn't meet their eyes and is crying, they know they heard correctly. _

"_Please say something." She begs. Their silence is killing her._

"_Who's the father?" Elliot finally speaks._

_Lizzie shakes her head before dropping it into her hands letting it all out. She cries even harder than she did just moments before. Elliot and Kathy move to the couch Lizzie is sobbing in with Elliot on her left and Kathy on her right, comforting their youngest daughter though there are upset about the news she told them. _

"_Who is the father?" Elliot asks again and when he doesn't receive an answer from her, he knows. He looks up from Lizzie to Kathy who is on the verge of tears. "You… You don't know, do you?" his voice is cracking as he tries to understand the whole situation his daughter is going through._

_Lizzie nods. She wants Elliot to warp his arms around her and tell her everything is going to be okay. But he doesn't._

"_How do you not know who the father is, Liz?" Then a horrific thought takes over in his head. "Were you…?" he hopes she understands what he means. When she shakes her head, he lets out the breath he had no idea he was holding in relief. "Then how don't you know?" _

_Lizzie tries to speak but stops. _

"_Liz?" _

"_I was at a party," she begins, "and I was supposed to be studying because I had an exam the next day but Clarissa really wanted me to go with her so I went… there was beer and I know I'm underage but have you ever felt pressured to do something?" she asks them but doesn't expect an answer so she continues, "I guess I had a little too much and I met a guy there… He's a friend of the one who threw the party and he's joining the Marines… I can't even remember his name. One thing led to another and so here I am with his child in my uterus." _

Elliot is pretty sure he was about to pass out when she told him all that. Right now Lizzie is asleep in what used to be her room; He probably should be in bed but he can't sleep. Sitting up, Elliot looks around the living room which is something he hasn't really taken the time since he had gotten back to do. He catches sight of Lizzie's graduation picture.

"Oh, God…" he drops his head in his hands and takes deep breaths. He isn't sure what's worse: his youngest daughter is pregnant before she hit twenty or the fact that she has no idea who the father of the baby is. He, being completely honest, would like to think his daughters are still virgins until marriage but he knew that Kathleen isn't and now he knows Lizzie, his baby girl, isn't either.

He can't sleep and he doesn't know what to do now. Before, he used to have calls in the middle of the night or he would go over to Olivia's just talk or watch a movie before getting called in. But she's married and he can't do that. He can't interfere with her marriage because during their partnership she had respected his. He misses his best friend though.

"Are we going to find this prick?"

Their voice startles him out of his thoughts he looks at his eldest son, "Richard, there isn't much we can do… She can't remember his name and he's in the marines," he pauses, "and it was consensual. I can't do anything about it."

Dickie's disappointed that his father is settling with just that. This isn't the same man he remembered. His father wouldn't have just done nothing five years earlier. Dickie sighs and plops down next to his old man. "With your help or not, I'm going to find that guy that took advantage of my sister while she was drunk." He's determined to do just that; with or without Elliot.

* * *

><p><em><strong>One week later… <strong>_

_**Langan Residence; 8:00pm**_

She moans and chuckles as her husband nips at her neck as his hands travel down her body and they sway slowly to the soft music that fills their bedroom. They rarely ever get a chance to spend romantic time with one another from their jobs, especially hers, and time with the kids. Today, though, was different as far as they can tell. Alex is watching Nicky and Leah for the night, wanting to spend some time with her "nephew and niece". Nicky is her godson while Leah is Casey's goddaughter. Olivia appreciates what Alex does and she is sure to return the favor once Alex finds "Mr. Right" and has that family she wants.

_And there are lines upon my face  
>From a life time of smiles<br>When the time comes to embrace  
>For one long last wine<br>We can laugh about how time really flies  
>We won<em>_'__t say goodbye  
><em>_'__Cause true love never dies  
>You'll always be beautiful in my eyes...<em>

_You will always be beautiful in my eyes  
>and the passing is the show<br>that you will always grow  
>ever more beautiful in my eyes<em>

_The passing is the show  
>that you will always grow<br>ever more beautiful in my eyes..._

Trevor sings along to this song into Olivia's ear with his eyes closed and holds her closer against his body as the song that they danced to for their wedding comes to an end. He lightly kisses her collarbone and her jawbone just below the ear, then whispers, "I love you," and lead her towards the bed. Tonight, it is just him with his wife… The woman he so dearly loves. No sex. He knows that it hasn't exactly been easy for her to see her best friend after five years. That man decides to leave and show up whenever he feels like it. If only Elliot knew how much it had broken Olivia when he left and now she was fine and happy. Now that man is back, wanting to step back into everyone's lives. How can he be okay with it? Elliot and Olivia have been oblivious about the chemistry they had since day one. With Elliot gone, Trevor had the opportunity to make a move that Elliot never had the balls to do and because of that, he now has this beautiful wife and two children. Life can't get any better. All it can get is worse.

Trevor removes Olivia's shirt then unclasps her bra. She lies down on the bed, on her stomach; knowing what he intends to do. Trevor reaches for the massaging oil on the night stand and squirts some out onto his palm. He warms the oil in his hands, and begins to stroke rhythmically upwards from her lower back to her neck then circles around back to her lower back. He hears her moan in pleasure.

"It's been quite some time since we had time to ourselves, huh?" he asks softly.

"Mhm…" she hums, "feels so good."

Trevor moves back up to her neck and begins to relieve a tight muscle. "Everything okay at work?" he asks.

"Briscoe's coming back the same time Elliot is… I'm still keeping Nick as my partner as I know. I don't know what Munch plans on doing…"

"I kind of thought he would stick you with Stabler again." He stops his hand movements and flips her over; his hand trails down to the button of her pants. He lowers his head and drops his forehead to hers. "Tell me you love me," he whispers, "please." He needs reassurance. He needs to know that Elliot's return won't cause any problems to their marriage.

"Trevor –,"

"Just, please, tell me you love me." He begs.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Two weeks later… <strong>_

_**Squad room; 8:00am **_

"Morning, Fin," Olivia walks into the office, "Rollins, Nick… Briscoe and… Briscoe isn't here yet?" Those three don't know about Elliot yet, she reminds herself.

"Not yet," Fin tells her as Nick hands her, her coffee, "you seem a bit excited about his return. Care to share?"

"I can't be excited to see one of the first people I met during my first year at SVU?"

Fin shrugs.

Munch emerges from what is now his office, "The two new members… I'm not excited sure if I can even call them new but…" he shrugs, "anyway, I had Briscoe pick up Stabler –,"

"Stabler?" Fin almost spits his coffee out and all over his paperwork. "Thought he left for good," he mumbles.

"Well, he's back. So you'll have to push your problems with him aside because he's your new partner."

Fin slams his empty mug down on his desk and makes his way up to the cribs to calm down. He wouldn't have minded if Elliot was his partner if he hadn't left the way he did. Munch knows that it pissed him off and yet he has the nerve to stick Stabler with him?

"Stabler, Briscoe, this is Amaro and Rollins. They're the only two you two don't know." Munch says.

"Pleasure to meet you both," Both Elliot and Ken say.

"Likewise," Nick and Amanda smile at both men and shake their outstretched hands.

"Where's Fin?" Elliot asks anyone who has an answer.

Munch hesitantly rubs the back of his neck, "He's in the cribs. He's pretty mad at you, Elliot… and he's your partner." He grins at Elliot before turning around and heading into his office.

Elliot didn't except all this to be easy. Olivia hasn't made eye contact with him since he walked in but did manage to get a "hi" from her. He sighs; there was still a lot to do at work and at home. He had found a two bedroom apartment a few days earlier and should be moving in, in about week. He had taken Lizzie and Dickie with him to help him furniture shop because Lizzie claimed that he'd "pick out the ugliest things in the store". He is still having trouble adjusting that his baby girl is pregnant but he's giving her all of his support.

He looks one last time at Olivia as Munch hands her a pink slip and then she walks out with Nick, her partner.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: One, I should be doing my chemistry homework… I've done, like, ten out of one hundred problems. Two, I should also be studying for my History quiz tomorrow but I can do that during school tomorrow. And three, is anyone else excited about Liv's new love interest in the show? I'm really excited… But I feel so alone because I've seen so many people disappointed…. **

**Review, please. :) **


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Is everything really "happy"? Trouble in paradise soon to come… By the way, thank you for the reviews! I've been really tempted to start a new fic but the pairing won't be E/O but O/T… just a thought going through my mind that won't leave me alone. Anyway, I'm watching the SVU marathon on USA and "Savant" is on. The girl, Katie, gives Elliot a hug. I want to hug him… okay, on to chapter seven.**

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><p>"<em>Where's Fin?" Elliot asks anyone who has an answer. <em>

_Munch hesitantly rubs the back of his neck, "He's in the cribs. He's pretty mad at you, Elliot… and he's your partner." He grins at Elliot before turning around and heading into his office. _

_Elliot didn't except all this to be easy. Olivia hasn't made eye contact with him since he walked in but did manage to get a "hi" from her. He sighs; there was still a lot to do at work and at home. He had found a two bedroom apartment a few days earlier and should be moving in, in about week. He had taken Lizzie and Dickie with him to help him furniture shop because Lizzie claimed that he'd "pick out the ugliest things in the store". He is still having trouble adjusting that his baby girl is pregnant but he's giving her all of his support._

_He looks one last time at Olivia as Munch hands her a pink slip and then she walks out with Nick, her partner. _

"Where were you?"

"At work, where else?" Olivia looks at Trevor questioningly as she walks past him towards the drawer. "Why?" she pulls out a tank top and black and pink plaid pajama bottoms.

"It's one in the morning," Trevor points at the clock on the night stand, "it's late. Your shift is over at nine o'clock."

Olivia takes off her blazer then shirt before putting on her tank top. Her hands go to her hips, and she gives Trevor an unpleased look, "I know it's over at nine, Trevor. I had a shitload of paperwork Munch wanted us to finish." She pulls down her slacks and kicks them off before pulling on her pants that hung low on her hips. "This needs to stop. It's only been twelve days since Elliot came back and every time I'm late you interrogate me as if you were a fucking cop!"

Trevor approaches her and tries to wrap his arms around her but she moves away and sits down on her side of their bed. "Olivia… you better not be lying to me."

Olivia rolls her eyes, "You're right," she begins and she sees the hurt in his blue eyes, "I'm lying. I was actually making love with my Spanish lover, Enrique, behind the Dunkin' Donuts next to KFC where I am pretty sure we conceived eight babies. That's right. It was unprotected."

"Olivia…"

"Don't."

She feels the bed dip as he sits down next to her. He puts one arm around her shoulders and presses his lips to the side of her head, "I'm sorry. It's just with Elliot back, I feel threatened."

"I barely say a sentence to the man, Trevor. Nothing's the same with Elliot and me… I don't know if we can go back to the way things used to be." She drops her head to his shoulder and places her hand on his knee.

"I don't want it to go back to the way it used to be with you and Elliot, Liv." He rubs her arm. He's scared that he may lose the only woman he has truly been able to love completely. "Because if things went back to the way you and Stabler…"

Olivia lifts her head and looks into his blue eyes, "Trevor, I love you." She assured him with a quick kiss to the lips. But she can't help but to admit to herself, that all the familiar feelings she felt when Elliot was around were rushing back now that he has returned. Trevor has nothing to worry about, she tells herself. And to reassure herself and her husband, she pushes him down on the bed.

"Livia…?"

She places her index finger over his lips, silencing him. She climbs on top of him, straddling his waist, and lowers her head to his ear, "Nothing to worry about. He isn't going to change our relationship Trevor; no one will." But she isn't completely sure who she is trying to convince more.

Trevor flips them over with on top of her now; his stubble is tickling her face as his kisses travel to her neck and begins to suck on her pulse point. He pulls back and stares at where a nice looking bruise appeared. She isn't aware of it, but he did it to show anyone who's looking that this goddess of a woman is his. The ring on her finger also proves that.

* * *

><p>"Okay… So what did he look like?" Dickie holds a small notepad and mechanical pencil in his hands, ready to jot bullet notes on the guy that got his sister pregnant. He was serious when he had said that he was going to find the guy even though he is possibly overseas in some country… far away.<p>

Lizzie groaned and rubbed her barely there bump. She is three months along and moving in with her father the next day, so while Dickie is questioning her about her baby's father, he's also helping her move while their father is at work.

"Lizzie…"

"Dickie…" she sticks her tongue out at him. "Look, I don't know! I was drunk!" she sits back on the headboard of her old bed. "Um… I know he had, like, black hair and there might have been red on the tips. Honestly, I think he was gay."

"He slept with you." Dickie points out as he wrote down "black hair, red tips". "I don't think a gay guy would… you're kind of missing something, sis."

"Just because he's gay doesn't mean he couldn't have slept with me. He can choose to have sex with a woman, but he's attracted to men which is something he can't help." Lizzie stands up and tries to help her twin out with one of her boxes when he slaps her hand away, "Richard, I think I can carry this shoe box out to your car. It only has pictures in it."

"A lot of pictures," Dickie smiles at her and takes the box before she could get to it. "Eye color?" he asks as they make their way down the stairs of the house they grew up in.

"I don't know… I know they weren't brown or anything. For all I know he could wear contacts!" she wants Dickie to drop the subject so they can meet up with their father for lunch.

Dickie sighs and runs his hand through his hair after he puts the box in the back of his car. "Liz, this guy needs to take responsibility for what he did! I thought you said you were on that birth control thing. How did you get pregnant?"

Lizzie leans against her brother's Civic and answers, "I was on it… I forgot to take it the next day because I spent most of the day puking my guts out and recovering from my hangover. Sperm stays inside for seventy-two hours, three days."

"That's gross."

"You learn something new every day."

* * *

><p>"Nick, say 'hi' to Trevor so he can leave me alone… again."<p>

Nick Amaro takes her cellphone, "Hey, Trevor… yeah, yeah… I'm her partner. Why would she… right… uh, bye." He gives Olivia a confused look and hands her back the phone which he hangs up. "What's that all about?" he leans back in his chair and kicks his feet up on the desk and folds his harms over his chest.

"He's assuming that I'm cheating on him." Olivia explains with an eye roll.

"Are you?"

"No!"

Nick shrugs and smiles innocently. "Sorry. I mean, you are pretty hot so I don't blame him for being worried. But why did it start all of a sudden?" He takes his feet off his desk and leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. He looks around the room before looking back at his partner, and whispers, "Is it Stabler?" When she nods, he says, "I don't know much about your partnership with him, but Munch always said you two were the best. Fin told me you two were the best of friends. Cragen always said you two had a friendship and partnership like no other… did you and him ever…?"

Olivia shakes her head and replies, "Never. He was married throughout our partnership. I respected Kathy and him. When they had their rough times and Kathy was on the verge of leaving him, I talked her out of it. I though, you know, 'hey, one of us has to be happy'."

"You were in love with him." Nick realizes with a nod. "This is why Trevor keeps calling. He wants to make sure you aren't alone with him because he's scared that with him back then those feelings will come back, and now that Stabler's single, you'd leave him for Stabler."

"What about Stabler, Amaro," Elliot asks, walking in and sitting down at his desk. Fin is right behind him, grumbling obscenities, and holding an ice pack over his eyes.

"Nothing," Nick and Olivia say quickly and she shoots him a look. He smiles, sheepishly, at her. "Sorry," he apologizes and turns his attention to Fin. "What happened?"

Fin huffs and glares at Elliot. "Stabler, here, ducked jus' in time for the father of the vic to swing his arm. I got hit instead." He hears Elliot chuckles. "This is what happens when you tell a very Catholic man that his fourteen year old daughter is a prostitute and was raped by her gym teacher-slash-pimp…"

Elliot cuts in, "And telling him she's pregnant just made everything ten times worse."

_Some things never change._

It was nine o'clock in the evening when they were beginning to finish up their paperwork. The first ones out the door were Nick and Amanda whom have become best friends. They were teased by Munch by being too much like Elliot and Olivia in their early years. Is Amanda like a younger version of Olivia? Is she in love Nick, her best friend? Olivia watches them leave; their steps are in perfect sync.

"Remind you of anyone?"

She looks at Elliot, half-smiling, and replies, "Us. Only they're not partners." They watch Briscoe leave, leaving just Fin who just finished his DD5. "How's Fin?"

Elliot shrugs a shoulder, "Doesn't talk much like we used to. Don't blame him." He'll give Fin time to cool down a bit. "How's married life treating you?"

Olivia laughs and shakes her head, "It's getting kind of rough right now with Trevor. He's having… trust issues." She sighs and closes her file. "How's it going with Liz? Kathy told me she's pregnant."

Elliot scrapes his teeth over his lip and scratches his temple. He is still pretty touchy about the subject. "She's, uh, good. Morning sickness is no more, which is good. Dickie complained that it kept him up at night."

"All day sickness," Olivia nods, "God, I hated it."

"_C'mon admit it detective you know you want to bang your partner, watch her grow swollen with your child, and why not man, she'd give you beautiful babies."_

Elliot's eyes travel down to her flat abdomen and tries to picture her pregnant in his head. "Two kids, huh?"

She nods with a huge smile on her face and picks up the picture frame of her two kids, Nicky and Leah. She knows that he has seen them but it was once and about a month ago. "Nickolas Joseph and Leah Grace," She hands him the picture and she watches him look at her son and daughter. "Amaro was the one that helped me get to the hospital… If we didn't get there when we did, Nicky's chances on surviving were slim. So, Trevor and I decided to name him after Nick." _And he also thinks I named him after my father, Joseph Hollister, my mother's rapist. _

"He's a good guy…" Elliot says and gives her the picture back.

Olivia hums in agreement, "Yeah, I agree." Just as she's about to say something, Trevor runs in with Leah in his arms. She quickly stands up, knowing something horrible happened. She runs over to him and takes Leah from him. That's when she notices that Nicky isn't with him. "Trevor, where's Nicky?" she asks him, beginning to panic.

That also catches Elliot's attention and stands up. Trevor notices Elliot, but at the moment he is too upset with what happened.

"I… the babysitter… she…" he takes deep breaths just to calm him down enough to spit the sentence out. "Mina said she took Leah to her nursery to put her down… and… and when she came out twenty minutes later, Nicky was missing," His face reddened in anger, "and her boyfriend."

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><p><strong>AN: Nicky's missing! Did the babysitter's boyfriend take him or is he also in trouble? **** I don't know… maybe… gotta review for Nicky's sake. ****More of Dickie trying to figure out who got Lizzie pregnant. Will he get closer? An E/O moment possibly. **


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: WOW! Thanks for the reviews! I was listening to a song, like a five seconds ago, that definitely had me thinking of Elliot and this story…well, in a way. The song's in Spanish, though, so I won't be putting it in here but I will be using the ideas that it gave me. Anyway, on to chapter eight! Mid-terms are killing me - . - I have a Parenting and Geometry exam tomorrow.**

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><p><em>Olivia hums in agreement, "Yeah, I agree." Just as she's about to say something, Trevor runs in with Leah in his arms. She quickly stands up, knowing something horrible happened. She runs over to him and takes Leah from him. That's when she notices that Nicky isn't with him. "Trevor, where's Nicky?" she asks him, beginning to panic. <em>

_That also catches Elliot's attention and stands up. Trevor notices Elliot, but at the moment he is too upset with what happened. _

"_I… the babysitter… she…" he takes deep breaths just to calm him down enough to spit the sentence out. "Mina said she took Leah to her nursery to put her down… and… and when she came out twenty minutes later, Nicky was missing," His face reddened in anger, "and her boyfriend." _

_**3 hours missing…**_

The redhead girl hangs her head in shame as the woman who used to pay her paced around the interrogation room. She brings the back of her hand to her face and wipes away the tears that have fallen. She hears Olivia take a deep breath, attempting to calm herself down. Mina lifts her head a little and her pale blue eyes dart over to the man next to her who appears to be just as upset as Olivia is even though it isn't his kid that's missing.

Olivia opens her mouth to speak but she only manages to end up choking on her words, so she turns away and bolts out the room. The worst possible thoughts engulf her mind. What if they were hurting her little boy? With what she sees on a day to day basis, she can't help but think that she may possibly end up seeing the body of her little Nicky in the morgue.

She feels him staring at her as if he were debating whether or not he should go up to her. "I feel so fucking useless, El." She tells him and places her hands on the wall outside the pit. She hangs her head and pictures a broken little three year old with brown eyes that hold no light. She pictures the same broken little boy with pale skin instead of the olive skin tone that resembled hers. "I…my baby, Elliot, my baby is missing."

Elliot, hesitantly, places his hand on her shoulder and turns her around so she could face him. "Olivia, I know what you're doing. Don't do this to yourself, okay?" He knows she's beating herself up because she had trusted a fifteen year old girl to babysit her children and because of that, her three year old son is missing. "This isn't your fault, okay?"

Olivia scoffs and looks away. "Trevor was right," she begins to tell him, "We should have used the precinct's daycare." She brings her hand to her forehead and takes several deep breaths. She needed to remain calm if she wanted to find her son. "Can you go talk to Mina?"

Elliot nods and goes into the interrogation room where Nick Amaro stood, staring down the fifteen year old. "Anything yet?" he asks Nick. When Nick shakes his head, Elliot sits across from Mina Yates. "So let me get this story straight, okay?" Mina nods. "You, a fifteen year old girl, were babysitting Olivia and Trevor's son, right? Why the hell was a twenty-five year old man there?"

"I, uh…well, you see…I"

"Stop stuttering," Nick barks.

Elliot holds his hand up, silencing Nick, before resting his elbows on the metal table, leaning forward. "Why was your twenty-five year old boyfriend there? You two are in deep shit right now and the fact that he's with a minor makes it all worse for him." Elliot narrows his eyes at the redheaded teenager.

Mina begins to cry again and apologizes once again.

"Sorry isn't going to bring Nickolas Langan back." Elliot pushes himself off his chair and paces around the room, like Olivia was doing twenty minutes earlier. "Detective Benson and Mister Langan trusted you with their child!" Elliot yells.

Nick moves closer to Mina, and says, "If you want to help find my partner's son, then tell us your boyfriend's name."

Mina shakes her head. "I c-can't." she stutters and drops her head in her hands.

Nick slams his hand on the cool metal table and glares at the teenage girl. "You got ten seconds to tell me what his name is. That little boy means the world to everyone in this unit and right now his mother and father are worried sick, wanting their little boy back."

Elliot stands next to Nick, cocking an eyebrow, "Why did you have your boyfriend take Nicky?" Elliot asks her. "You know where he is and where he is keeping Nicky Langan. Why are you protecting him, huh? Are you really so cold hearted that you'd have a little boy locked in some basement, scared shitless and let his parents think the worst possibilities?" He's trying to make her feel guilty because he believes that Mina knows exactly where her boyfriend is keeping Nicky. "It's working, ya know?" Elliot leans against the wall and crosses his arms over his muscular chest.

Nick lets Elliot talk and closes his eyes and takes a deep breath to calm himself down. He can't say he knows what Olivia and Trevor are going through but Nicky's his little man. They're close. Nick knows that he's Nicky's favorite "Uncle" even if Fin and Munch fight him about it.

When Mina doesn't answer, Nick can't take it anymore and leaves. He sees Cragen looking frustrated along with Munch who is barking orders at people. Fin appears to be ready to punch someone in the face and through the two-way mirror, if someone doesn't pull Elliot out; he's going to end up punching Mina.

Olivia walks over to Nick and shakes her head, "We're getting nowhere, Nick. She won't tell us what her boyfriend's name is…I need to find my son, Nick."

"I know, Liv, I know."

"Trevor and I… we're supposed to protect him from things like this. I'm a cop, dammit!" She swallows back a sob and pulls out her cellphone from her back pocket. She quickly dials her husband's number and with a shaky breath, she hears him answer. "Is everything okay? No…just stay home with Leah, okay? I…I don't know when I'll be home, babe. Mina won't give up her boyfriend's name and yelling from Elliot and Nick isn't working." She pauses when she hears the tears in his voice. It breaks her heart even more and she can't hold back her own tears any longer. She excuses herself from the others, wiping the tears away as she makes her way up to the cribs.

Just as she walked out the pit, Elliot bursts out the interrogation room. "Where's Olivia? We got a goddamn name!"

"What's the name?"

"Preston Levi Martinez," Elliot says and follows the other men out into the bullpen, "he was released six months ago." Elliot runs a hand over his dark cropped hair in irritation. He can't believe that Preston is out of jail.

"You know who Preston is?" Nick tilts his head, trying to get on the same page as the others. That's when Amanda walks in and drops a file on Nick's desk and faces Munch. Ken makes his way over to the computer and pulls up the pictures of Nicky, smiling, and Preston Martinez's mug shot from ten years ago, when he was fifteen. "Don't you just love your badge and gun?" Amanda asks the men. She had taken it upon herself to question one of Mina's close friends and they told her it was a man named Preston Martinez.

Ken nods in agreement. "One little threat never hurts anybody." He turns around to face the others. "Stabler, you and Benson arrested Martinez back in two thousand six. Langan was his defense attorney who lost the case, remember?" He wasn't in the unit at the time but he read the files.

Elliot nods as does Cragen, Fin, and Munch. Amanda and Nick just stand by, listening to the story. "He was up for parole in ten years, which is why he was released six months ago. He was supposed to be going to his parole officer every two weeks. When was the last time he went?"

"He told us two weeks ago. Martinez is living with his sister, according to him. He's up to be checked on tomorrow." Ken informs them.

Cragen walks up to the computer and presses a few keys. "She lives in Queens. Do you think he'd be stupid enough to hide Nicky there? I'm pretty sure he would know that we'd up talking to his parole officer."

Fin slumps in his chair and taps his fingers against his desk. "He ain't stupid. It took us forever to find him back in oh-six." Fin scratches the side of his head as he thinks. "Stabler, you and Baby-Girl found the victim in some warehouse right? Just outside the city,"

Elliot hums, "Yeah. You think he's keeping Nicky in a warehouse?"

"Nope," Fin sighs. After ten years, that once fifteen year old boy is now twenty-five. He must have improved his technique. "This time he's looking for revenge. What better way than to hook up with some depressed teenager that happens to babysit Liv and Trevor's kids? I don't think he has the balls hurtin' lil' Nicky."

"I'll go tell Liv what we've got so far."

* * *

><p><em><strong>4.5 hours missing…<strong>_

"We think Preston Martinez has Nicky, Olivia."

Olivia tilts her head slightly to the right, "Preston Martinez…who?"

"Remember, ten years ago, we had a case. The one with three victims…uh, what were their names? Jamie Norman, Katelyn Easter, and Braden Howell were the names of the victims and we were only able to prove to one of them."

"He was just a fifteen year old boy, Elliot…he did so much. He caused so much pain to those families. Braden was only seven years old." She looks sadly into his blue eyes. At the time, Elliot had questioned how a fifteen year old boy with straight A's could commit such crimes. He didn't believe it. Olivia had begun to believe it, too, when a new piece of evidence came in. "And Nicky is only three…" she looks down at the floor and she feels the mattress dip on her bunk where Elliot had taken upon himself to sit. "I can't even protect my own son, Elliot."

Elliot puts his arm around her shoulders, comforting her when she needs it most. "Olivia, stop blaming yourself."

Olivia pulls away and stands up. "All I'm doing is acting the same way you would have if this was your kid, Elliot! I'm having a difficult time breathing right now because I'm thinking: What if Nicky's dead and I'm here breathing instead of him? Huh? I hate myself for it because I'm the fucking picture of health when he might be buried underground in the woods."

"Olivia," Elliot warns, "don't think like that."

Olivia sits next to him again and asks, "And what would you be doing at this very moment if this was Eli or Dickie when they were three? Elliot, tell me that you would be as calm as the eye of a fucking hurricane if you were in this situation. Tell me, right now, that you wouldn't be blaming yourself. Put yourself in my shoes, Elliot."

He doesn't speak or look her in the eyes.

"Exactly," Olivia pushes herself farther back in the bunk until her back hit the wall. She relaxes just a little and closes her eyes. "Why did he take Nicky? What could he possibly want with my son?"

"We think he's after revenge." He runs his index finger and thumb over the corners of his mouth, and says, "We arrested him and Trevor lost."

"And he had to go after my three year old son? Do you know how scared he most likely is? All those times you said I wouldn't understand what a parent is going through during our partnership…"

"Liv, I didn't mean it…"

"No, you were right. I didn't know then but now I'm a parent of two…I don't want to lose either of them. I need to find and bring Nicky home."

"We're going to find your son, Liv." Elliot assures her. He, hesitantly, takes her hand in his and squeezes gently. "I'm here if you need a shoulder to cry on. Even after five years, you're still my best friend, Liv. I hope you know that."

And she does. She's been trying to hold it in ever since she they found out Nicky, her sweet little boy, was kidnapped. Every now and then, the tears escape her but she hasn't fully let it all out. Until now, she finally falls into his embrace and sobs.

She cries because Nicky's missing and no one knows where Preston, their main suspect, is. She cries because what if he's already dead? Preston wants revenge. But why didn't he go after her? She, since the day Nicky was born, was ready to die for him. Same goes with Leah, her baby girl. As a cop, she had thought that she could protect her children like any mother would. Today, she learns that that's not the case.

And for the first time in years, she prays.

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><p><strong>AN: Mm… I wasn't all too sure about this chapter but I hope you like. Next, they go to that house in Queens that belongs to Preston's sister. Will she know where Preston is? Did you like this one of many baby steps towards E/O? Where's Nicky? Is Preston really behind all this? Does Mina have anything to do with this? Don't know….maybe….have to review to find out (:**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews…I've been so sick the last couple of days that I just couldn't bring myself to type this except complain on Twitter. :P So, like, the Superbowl is today, right? I actually forgot until I saw all over Twitter. I like the Redskins so I honestly don't care who wins...I'm only watching for the commercials.**

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><p><em>She cries because Nicky's missing and no one knows where Preston is. She cries because what if he's dead already? Preston wants revenge. But why didn't he go after her? She, since the day Nicky was born, was ready to die for him. Same goes with Leah, her baby girl. As a cop, she had thought that she could protect her children like any mother would. Today, she learns that that's not the case. <em>

_And for the first time in years, she prays._

_**6.5 hours missing…**_

_Olivia, take a deep breath and remain calm. _

_Nicky's fine…Preston isn't going to hurt him…_

_Just some little prank to get her to freak out but he's bringing Nicky back…_

"Who the fuck am I kidding?" Olivia asks herself as she paces back in forth in the cribs; running her fingers through her chestnut hair. She's losing it even more by the second. The red hand ticking, as the seconds go by, is mocking her and telling her that the longer Nicky is out there missing; the chances of him being found alive were slowing diminishing.

She stops dead in her tracks in the back corner of the dark room, when the door swings open. She is just about to say something, to acknowledge her presence in the room but the voices stop her from doing so. The street light outside lights only the front part of the cribs so she is able to see who it is.

Elliot and Casey.

She knows she shouldn't be listening but curiosity got the best of her, so she stays. She quietly sits down on one of the beds and remains out of sight. First, she hears Elliot's voice.

"So what is it that you needed to talk to me about, Case?" From where she sits, she is able to make out that he folds his arms over his chest and leans against the wall, waiting for Casey to respond. "I mean, it's important, right, since you didn't want to talk to me with Nick and Fin around."

Olivia sees Casey nod slowly, as if she is nervous, but about what?

"I was, uh, since you…I don't know how to say this." She covers her face with her hands, like she is trying to cover the blush that might be forming on her pale face.

Olivia tilts her head. What could Casey possibly have to tell Elliot? Casey usually goes to either her or Alex…and lately the conversations have had nothing to do with Elliot Stabler. Unless it pertains to any of their current case…which is now unlikely because Casey isn't the one on any of their cases because Alex is the one, but even if it does, she is still able to say it in front of Nick.

This has to be personal.

Olivia feels a bit of guilt for eavesdropping.

But like they say: curiosity killed the cat but satisfaction brought it back… _Or some shit like that… _

"Casey, it's not like I don't want to have this conversation with you but now really isn't the time. You know we're looking for Olivia and Trevor's son…and if it has nothing to do with that…"

Casey cuts in, "No…it has nothing to do with Nicky, but I don't know when I might see you again and I just wanted to get this out of my chest…" She trails off; trying to form the words she wants to tell him.

Olivia can tell Elliot is growing impatient by his foot tapping and his fingers tapping against his bicep. She knows Casey needs to hurry up and tell him because an impatient and annoyed Elliot is always a no, no. Olivia, of all people, knows that.

"Novak, just tell me."

"Do you still have feelings for Kathy?" She finally spits out.

Olivia watches Elliot tilt his head, and hears him ask, "Excuse me? I'm not sure why you need to know that…"

"Elliot, it's just a 'yes' or 'no' question."

Olivia holds back a laugh because knows he's rolling his eyes at that moment, but the conversation seems to be getting better, in her opinion.

"Yes and no."

Huh?

As if Elliot read her mind or it might be the confusion that may be all over Casey's face, he answers, "I love Kathy; I always will, _but_ I'm not _in_ love with her nor is she _in_ love with me." He pauses for just a second. "She was my first love, Novak, and she gave me the five children that mean the world to me."

"But you left…." Casey whispers.

That might as well have been a slap to the face, Olivia says in her head.

"Are you questioning my love for my children?" Olivia can hear the anger in his voice. "Just because I left…it doesn't mean I stopped loving my kids, Kathy, or…or…" He stops talking. He probably thinks he's said too much to Casey.

"Olivia?" Casey asks, tiling her head slightly.

Olivia furrows her eyebrows. Elliot couldn't possibly have almost said that…And what would Casey know about who Elliot loves or not. Her eyes dart over to the clock…he's been silent for thirty seconds before he clears his throat.

"What are you trying to say?"

"That's what you were going to say, right?" Casey begins. "You were going to say you never stopped loving Olivia…We all know." She tells him.

Elliot scoffs. "Casey, stop talking."

"Do you love her, Elliot?" Casey takes a step forward. "Everyone thinks you do…Kathy, Fin, Munch, Cragen, Alex, and even…Trevor."

Elliot takes a step back and looks at Casey as if she's lost her fucking mind. "Are you serious now? Yeah, I love Liv-"

She stops listening there and her breathing hitches. Then she hears, "as my best friend…" but there's something in his tone…the way he said it.

"Do you really? She used to love you."

_That bitch._

Something must have been written across his face because she says, "Yeah, used to, Elliot. Well, now's she moved on."

_What is the point of this conversation?_

Casey grabs Elliot's shirt collar and pulls him closer to her the best she can. "Elliot, you're single…she's married…move on…with me." Olivia can tell how close the ADA's lips are to Elliot's. It takes all she can to stop herself from saying something to get them to break apart.

"Casey, stop." Elliot puts his hands around her forearms and pushes them away before backing away from her. "I don't…Casey; I don't feel the same way."

Casey sighs and runs her fingers through her strawberry blond hair in frustration. "Elliot, move on. She's happily married to Trevor…and…and Kathy's with Liam. You need to move on and who better than a very single ADA like me? We've known each other for years and-"

Elliot, irritated, cuts her off by saying, "I can't be with you if I don't see you as anything more than a friend, Novak!" He's hanging onto someone he can't have…Olivia can only assume Kathy…but he had said that he isn't in love with her. Is he only saying that just to get Casey off his back?

Taking a deep breath, Elliot rubs the back of his head and continues, "I know I should move on…and you're right, Case, I'm in love with her…I have been for a long time." Elliot moves to the nearest bunk and sits down. He rests his forearms on his knees and hangs his head, in what appears to be, in shame. "I'm sorry that our feelings aren't mutual, Casey, but you have to understand…I need time."

Casey takes the bunk opposite from Elliot's, licks her lips, and says, "Time to get over her?"

Elliot slowly nods, "Yeah…"

Olivia's sure she stopped breathing the minute he admitted he's in love with her. Where was that confession five years ago? All the familiar feelings she felt from nineteen ninety-nine to two-thousand eleven, are rushing back…in her mind…her _heart_. She wants it to stop. Now…She isn't supposed to feel any of those feelings now that she's _married_ Trevor with two kids…_Holy shit…_

Where are they on the case? Did they go talk to Preston? Cragen has forbidden her to do anything…only allowing her to talk to the babysitter. She swallows hard now that she realizes that her son has been missing for nearly seven hours.

"Try…with me, Elliot, I can help you get over Olivia…" Casey tries.

Elliot sighs, runs his hand down his face, and says, "I shouldn't be talking about this with you especially when Liv's three year old is missing…maybe we'll talk about this some other time. "I have to go talk to Preston's sister with Fin…" With that, he gets up and leaves, leaving Casey and Olivia with their thoughts.

Olivia waits for Casey to leave before waiting ten minutes to go downstairs…Nicky's her number one priority right now…everything Elliot said shouldn't bother her.

_I love Trevor_, she tells herself and attempts to smile.

* * *

><p><em><strong>7 hours missing…<strong>_

Elliot brings his knuckles up to the door and gives two swift knocks. There are two cars in the drive-way, meaning someone is home. As he waits, his mind drifts back to the conversation he had with Casey before he left with Fin and Amaro – he wanted to tag along since Nicky means everything to him.

_She used to love you._

Those words continue to ring in his head and he can't take it. He hates himself for opening up to her because now she knows what he feels for Olivia. And did she just say Olivia used to love him just for the hell of it or is it for real?

_She used to love you._

He wants to block out those words but they just keep getting louder and louder. Where is Preston's sister? If she opens the door, that'll distract him for a while and he can focus on finding Olivia's son back home to her and Trevor.

_SHE USED TO LOVE YOU._

That's it. He cracks and he brings his fist up to the door and begins to bang on it before Nick and Fin pull him back. He looks down and takes in a deep breath to calm himself down.

Nick furrows his eyebrows as he looks at Elliot, wondering what the hell just happened. Just as he's about to ask him what's up, the door slowly opens and a Hispanic looking woman pokes her head out. Her light brown eyes stare at the three detectives before saying:

"Are you here to check on Preston?" Her accent is thick…but very attractive…Like Salma Hayek. "You aren't his Parole Officer." She narrows her eyes at them and is just about to close her front door on them when Elliot speaks up.

"Was your brother home last night?"

Preston's sister rolls her eyes, "_Por supuesto. _He only leaves the house with me." She says it as if it is as clear as day. Her heads goes back inside for a second before opening the door all the way. She is wearing pink satin robe that just went down mid-thigh. Her hands go to her hips and one of her knees bend, her full wait on her opposite leg. "_No __ven __que __hora __es__?_ He isn't supposed to be checked on until ten in the morning." Her bare foot taps against the wooden floor as she, impatiently, waits for them to say something important or to leave.

Nick takes a step forward, and says in Spanish, "_Así __que __estoy __seguro__ de __que __él __está __aquí __ahorita__, _¿_no?_"

She bites her bottom lip. "Can I see your badges?"

Nick and Fin unzip their light sweaters and Elliot looks down at his hip where his badge is clipped.

With a nod, she steps to the side and crosses her arms just under breast, as if trying to get attention from either all three or one of them – Nick maybe. Once they were inside, she makes her way to the stairs that led down to the basement and calls out for her "hermanito".

They hear the door open and footsteps making their way up the wooden stairs. "What the hell do you want, Rebecca?" he asks his sister, angrily. And unlike his sister, he has no Spanish accent but his voice is hoarse as if he has been asleep for a while. "I ain't supposed to be checked on until ten…" his brown eyes lock with Elliot's. "What do you want?"

"Do you know a Mina Yates?"

"Who the fuck is that…?" He's giving Elliot a lot of attitude and Elliot's ready to lose his cool.

Elliot bites the inside of his cheek. Preston is either a really good liar or he honestly doesn't know who Mina is. "Girlfriend," he tells him.

"Nah, _Detective Stabler_, I'm not seeing anyone…at least not that I know." He leans up against the wall and shoos his sister away. "Why do you ask?" he tilts his head. "Oh and how's Detective Benson? Did you finally knock her up like everyone expected you to end up doing?"

Fin, already used to Elliot's short temper, quickly, stops Elliot from getting to Preston and shoving his head through the wall. "Ain't worth it, Elliot," he turns his attention to Preston. "Can we go check out your basement?"

Preston chuckles and licks his lips, "Sure. Go ahead…I have nothing to hide." He holds out his hand in the direction to the basement. Nick is first to go down, Fin follows, but Elliot stays back and makes Preston go on in between him and Fin. "You always lacked trust, Detective." Preston laughs.

"Porn, porn, porn…oh, look," Nick feigns shock, "more porn…Is that a power ranger?" His hand reaches out to pick up the action figure when Preston runs up and slaps his hand away.

Preston picks it up and shoots Nick a dirty look. "Never touch it."

That brings a flashback to Elliot and Fin's mind. They remember the first time they met Preston…that same power ranger and a stuffed bear were his prized possessions. They were told by his mother that it was all he had left from his father before being murdered right in front of his eight year old eyes. Ever since that day, Preston has never been the same.

"Preston, you never did tell us why you hurt those children…you're out now…why'd you do it?" Elliot asks as he looks around the windowless room, looking for anything that may look suspicious and lead them to Nicky.

The twenty-five year old Hispanic man sits down on his bed and looks down at his red ranger. "I told you I didn't do it. I was framed." He shakes his head and laughs but it isn't amused. "I told you: it was Brandon that junior in my high school…but no you didn't believe me…it's because I came from a troubled home and…and…it's because I'm not one of you." He looks up at Elliot. "You were so convinced that the Hispanic boy that came from a poor and dangerous neighborhood could do this and not that rich _gringo_."

Nick and Fin look at Elliot, whose jaw clenches.

"I am not racist, Preston. I just believed what the damn evidence said and that evidence pointed directly at you. It had nothing to do with your ethnicity." He looks at the two other detectives. "Fin, you've known me for years…"

Fin waves his hand, telling him he knows that he isn't what Preston believes. Nick hasn't known Elliot long enough but he knows that he isn't either.

Fin speaks up, "Brandon had an alibi."

Preston huffs and abruptly gets up. "Get out." His nostrils flare and any second now, he's going to explode.

* * *

><p><em><strong>7 hours and 56 minutes missing…<strong>_

Elliot presses his lips together and leans back in his chair, staring intently at the pictures on the computer screen. He points at the picture of Preston Martinez with his pen. "Mina lied to us…Preston doesn't know who she is."

Munch touches the computer screen with his fingers and moves Preston's photo to the side and brings up Mina's. He peers over his glasses to look at the picture of Nicky before glancing over at the clock. They were nearing eight hours and they were back to where they started.

Olivia emerges from Munch's office and lets out a shaky breath at the sight of Nicky's smiling picture they had just taken a few weeks earlier. Her brown eyes look down at Nick's desk where she finds a framed photo of Nick, Nicky, and Zara. She attempts to smile at the photo but fails.

She looks over at Elliot who quickly looks away. "Anything from Preston," she asks and takes the chair next to Elliot's desk.

Elliot shakes his head, "I highly doubt he did it…he claims he doesn't know who Mina is…"

Olivia purses her lips, "And you believe him."

"Olivia, I'm also thinking that he may have not killed the three other children ten years ago. He still insists that it's Brandon."

"He pulled the racist card on you, too?"

Elliot looks at her in confusion, "Did you go talk to him?"

"Well, I didn't leave the precinct…I did talk to him on the phone, though." She says with a shrug.

"Olivia…"

"Look, let's just go bring Mina down here again…I'm not done yelling at her and neither is Nick…"

Olivia stands, runs her fingers through her hair, and leaves. She doesn't care who comes with her as long as she has some back-up…not like she needs it because at this very moment she's just about to lose it. No one is going to stop or distract her.

Elliot places his hand on her upper arm and she looks at him over her shoulder. They are both tired but they've gone longer without sleep. "I got Nick to stay behind," he tells her softly. "Let's go find your son." He half smiles at her before dropping his hand and opening the passenger door to the brown police issued sedan.

* * *

><p>Grumbling, he sits up and rubs his eyes and looks at the clock. It's just little after five in the morning and Richard is trying to enjoy sleeping in now that he's graduated from high school. He doesn't plan on going to college…well, maybe some time in the future but he's decided that he's going to go to the police academy and follow in his father's footsteps. Well, except for joining the marines. He isn't doing that…<p>

He gets off the couch that he was sleeping on and searches for his phone that's somewhere around his father's living room. The buzzing hasn't stopped so the person on the other line isn't going to give up. Once he finds it, he taps on the screen, "This better be an emergency."

"_Richard Stabler?" the man sounds unsure. _

Dickie scratches the spot behind his ear and says, "Yeah, this is Richard. Who's this?"

"_Tell your father, Elliot, and Olivia Benson that if they want Nickolas Langan back in perfect condition," he pauses to chuckle and look over at the sleeping three year old, "they'd better look harder and get two million dollars by Sunday – that's three days." He clears his throat. "Richard, are you still there? You're wasting time…if I don't have my money by Sunday, the boy's going bye-bye. Expect more calls." _

Beep.

Dickie tries to catch his breath before dialing his dad's number. "D-dad, he wants money!" Dickie had no clue Nicky's been kidnapped but at least now he feels like he can help. "The guy that kidnapped Nicky…he called…he-he…Sure I'll meet you guys at the station."

As he pulls a shirt on over his head, he heads out. Nicky's life can either continue or end on Sunday.

_Three days…_

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><p><strong>AN: Will they find him in three days? Who's the guy on the phone? I picture him with one of those French-like moustaches…. We got a confession out of Elliot…Will Olivia say something like that? Or is she really in love with Trevor like she says she is? ****Anyway, I have a lot up my sleeve :D … and it may be a bit OOC but trust me on this…I'll try to make it good(I'm really excited about it...) ****Review ( Twitter: WendyEAlvarez )**

**I have a new New Year's resolution… I'm going TRY to stop using the… "F" word :/ **


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: I am so sorry for taking so long! I've been busy…and brainstorming. On Friday, I totally BS'd this essay we had to do in History…I wrote barely three paragraphs and on the back I put "Clearly, I had no idea what I was talking about." I don't know ish about the Indian Ocean trade haha. I have been getting so much homework so I put that as my first priority. By the way, thanks for reviewing, guys! That keeps me going! **

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><p>"<em><strong>Richard Stabler?" the man sounds unsure. <strong>_

_Dickie scratches the spot behind his ear and says, "Yeah, this is Richard. Who's this?" _

"_**Tell your father, Elliot, and Olivia Benson that if they want Nickolas Langan back in perfect condition," he pauses to chuckle and look over at the sleeping three year old, "they'd better look harder and get two million dollars by Sunday – that's three days." He clears his throat. "Richard, are you still there? You're wasting time…if I don't have my money by Sunday, the boy's going bye-bye. Expect more calls." **_

_Beep. _

_Dickie tries to catch his breath before dialing his dad's number. "D-dad, he wants money!" Dickie had no clue Nicky's been kidnapped but at least now he feels like he can help. "The guy that kidnapped Nicky…he called…he-he…Sure I'll meet you guys at the station." _

_As he pulls a shirt on over his head, he heads out. Nicky's life can either continue or end on Sunday. _

_**Three days…**_

_**8.5 hours missing…**_

Elliot paces back and forth in the interrogation with his arms crossed over his chest. The redheaded girl sits at the metal table, ashamed. He stops, looks at her, shakes his head, runs his hand down his face, and finally begins to pace again. He doesn't know where to start with this girl. She's already facing time, so why doesn't she just tell them the truth? She lied about Preston as did her friend. What he wants to know is how she knows Preston Martinez.

"I want my lawyer…" she whispers.

Elliot throws his head back and laughs. "You do realized your lawyer isn't coming, right? You need a new one. We're providing on for you but it is pretty hard considering the fact that majority of them work at Henshall and Langan."

Mina looks up at Elliot and locks eyes with him. She refused a lawyer earlier and her parents are yet to be found. "Trevor's not coming?"

Nick snorts.

All the fake amusement on Elliot's face is gone once those words left the girl's mouth. "You're kidding, right?" When she doesn't respond, Elliot sits down across from her. "You know who has Nicky and you won't tell us. Your lawyer is the _father _of the missing boy. You had his son kidnapped, why?"

No response.

"I know my rights." She narrows her eyes at him. "I don't have to talk to you." She spits.

Nick slams his hands against the cool metal table and leans forward, "I can't believe you. At this moment, I don't give a rat's ass that you're fifteen years old, so, honestly, I hope you that the next time I see you you'll be dead after drowning in a pool of sulfuric acid."

Elliot glances up at Olivia's partner. "Uh, Detective Amaro, take a minute to cool off, will you?"

Nick looks down at Elliot and nods. He pushes himself away from the table and leaves the room.

Once Nick is gone, Elliot cracks his knuckles and fingers then clasps his hand behind his head after leaning back in his chair. "Who was at Detective Benson and Mister Langan's home while you babysat Leah and Nicky?"

"I want my lawyer!" Mina barks.

Elliot holds up his hands, mocking innocence and leaves the room. Once out there, he sees Nick still fuming, Cragen shaking his head, Munch rubbing the back of his neck, but Olivia and Fin are nowhere to be found.

"Has Trevor come in?" Elliot asks.

"He stopped by about twenty minutes ago with Leah. They just brought Liv something to eat." Cragen informs him.

"Fin's in room three with Richard."

With a nod, Elliot emerges from the pit and into the pen. Olivia is staring at the photo in her lap – Nicky.

Elliot sits down in the wooden chair by her desk. "Dickie's telling Fin everything he knows." He tells her. He sees the hurt, worry, and fear written all over her face as she stares down at the baby picture of her son. Nicky had blue eyes when he was born like Trevor but they changed as he got older and are now brown just like Olivia's.

"I know." She whispers. Clearing her throat, she puts the picture back on her desk and runs her fingers through her brown hair. They just need to wait for Dickie to finish with Fin and for a lawyer to come forward and defend Mina.

"I heard Trevor came by earlier. How's he doing?" he asks.

"He's just keeping Leah happy for the time being. She's obviously noticed that Nicky hasn't been around." She makes eye contact with him, and then all she can hear are the words he said earlier in the cribs.

_And you're right, Case, I'm in love with her…I have been for a long time._

Deciding to get her mind off that, she changes the subject. "Have you talked to Kathleen?"

Elliot pulls his bottom lib between his lips before letting go. "She's mad…still. The last time I spoke to her was three weeks because I tried talking to her again, but she refuses." The hurt is obvious. He loves his children more than life itself, so when one's ignoring him for longer than a day hurt.

"Have you talked to Maureen?"

He smiles. "Yeah, I have." He says softly. "She says she'll visit me with her fiancé, Nate, once she can get away from work."

"That's good." She smiles at him but it doesn't reach her eyes for her thoughts were still on Nicky. Amanda and Ken are out solving a rape-homicide case. With a shaky breath, she realizes they're still nowhere on both the search for her son and the rape and murder of Tina Morrison.

"Give her something to drink, run her DNA and look for her biological parents."

That voice. They haven't heard it in sixteen years. Elliot and Olivia look up at the same time to find Detective Brian Cassidy standing by the doors that led in and out of the squad room. He looks so much older. His hair was salt and peppered along with his stubble. "What's up, Benson, Stabler?" he smiles at them, knowing that he has them shocked just by their facial expression. "I'm only here to help out with the rape-homicide case but don't hurt telling you things that probably slipped your mind." He knocks on the Captain's door, half-expecting Don to be on the other side though he knows well that Munch is in charge now.

"I'll get her some water then I'll drag Nick out of there so he can calm down. He really loves your kid."

She nods in agreement. "Yeah…he does."

* * *

><p><em><strong>11 hours missing…<strong>_

Brian Cassidy enters the squad room and takes the chair by the computers and brings up the pictures of the rape-homicide of Tina and then the pictures of Nicky and Mina. Just as he looks at the pictures, the phone next to him rings.

"Detective Cassidy, Special Victims," He says.

"_I suggest you stop talking to Mina Yates, Detective. She isn't saying anything." The man laughs. _

Brian's eyes widen and he looks around the pen trying to catch someone's attention. He notices Morales enter with equipment for another case. He places his hand over the receiver and calls out for Morales. "Hey, I have the kidnapper on the line – track it."

Morales works quickly to set up his equipment and Brian returns to stall the man on the line. "How's Benson's son?"

_The man runs a hand over his goatee and looks down at the boy who silently cried for his mother and father. "He wants his mommy and daddy, Detective, tell Detective Benson to work harder. Remember, Sunday's the deadline or," he pauses to laugh once more, "Nicky says bye-bye." _

Brian squint his eyes. That voice…it is oh-so familiar. He heard it years ago but he can't remember where. "Do I know you from somewhere?"

"_The only one that doesn't know me is Detective Stabler, Cassidy." _

"Got it," Morales announces. "He's somewhere just outside the city."

Brian snaps his fingers just as Munch and Fin come out the pit. "Kidnapper isn't as bright as he thought," he whispers after placing his hand over the receiver again.

Munch grins from ear to ear and tells to go to the address Morales just printed off for them and then tells him that he will meet him with Elliot, Nick, and Cragen along with backup.

_The kidnapper kneels at Nicky's level and hands the boy the phone. "Tell momma's friend to help you." _

"_He-help," Nicky hiccups. "Momma?" he calls for his mother. _

"_Uh-uh, time's up." He takes the phone from the three year old and places it over his ear. "I know you traced the call, Detective. I'm not stupid. Put it on speaker and make sure Olivia Benson is there with you." He sounds angry. _

Brian sets the phone on speaker just as Olivia walks in the room with a bottle of water with Elliot. "It's the kidnapper, Liv." Brian informs.

"Is Nicky all right?" she runs up to Brian and stands next to his sitting figure by the phone.

"_Don't worry, Olivia, your boy is fine…for now, at least. The clock's ticking, Olivia," he swallows hard, trying to keep his temper in check. "I hope you and that god damn husband of yours are suffering. I hope you feel what I felt when the one thing I loved most was taken away from me…Good bye, Detectives." _

Beep.

"Oh, my God…I haven't heard that voice in years…he kidnapped my son?" Olivia is in shock.

"Wait…you know who did it? Who was that on the phone?" Elliot looks at her, confused. When he looks at the others, he knows that they all know something he doesn't.

"Benson!" Rollins calls out. She has two folders in her hands. "Melinda says you better look at the results. Guess who came back as the biological father of Mina Yates?" she hands the older woman the folder while she sits down at her desk right across from her partner, Ken.

"Get going!" Munch tells Fin and Nick.

Fin and Nick mock salute and ran out the squad room faster than they ever have before.

Olivia looks through the results with Elliot looking over her shoulder.

"I…this is…no…but why?" she brings a hand up to her forehead. "That bastard…" she swallows down a sob. She feels Elliot's reassuring hands on her shoulder and the small of her back. At the moment, that gesture is the least of her concerns. All she cares about is finding the kidnapper on time to rescue her son.

She can deal with Elliot later.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Who is it? Do they get there on time or does he move to another location? Is the man who you think it is? Does Mina tell them what she knows later? Does Olivia really deal with Elliot later? Whatever happened to Casey? Trevor? **

**All will be answered within the next couple of chapters. All you have to do is review(: **

**O/T fans? I've got one up called Dead. Trevor and Olivia in Witness Protection! :D **

**By the way, I wasn't all too satisfied with the chapter, so please tell me what you thought. I just wanted to have this up by tonight because I had you guys waiting for nearly twenty days.**

**Remember my new years resolution? Stop saying the F word? I failed miserably. :/**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Thanks again for the reviews! I'm sorry for keeping you guys waiting but I started a new EO friendship, OT romance fic and it's kind of a remake of one I didn't finish. It's "Recovery" and I'm not sure I want to continue that. Anyway, as for the kidnapper he's WAY OOC! Just a little heads up. By the way, this chapter was incredibly hard for me to write, so I'm not too happy with it. I rewrote it, like, ten million times (it was actually, like, three) **

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><p><em>Olivia looks through the results with Elliot looking over her shoulder. <em>

"_I…this is…no…but why?" she brings a hand up to her forehead. "That bastard…" she swallows down a sob. She feels Elliot's reassuring hands on her shoulder and the small of her back. At the moment, that gesture is the least of her concerns. All she cares about is finding the kidnapper on time to rescue her son. _

_She can deal with Elliot later._

Not even ten minutes after everyone left, Olivia's cellphone begins to ring, and she quickly picks up after the first without looking at the number, she knows who it is. "I swear to God, if I wasn't forced to stay here and sit on my ass, I would find and kill you myself."

"_Now, now, Liv, is that the way you should be talking to me? You are aware that I'm the one with the boy. He looks just like you…I'm no pedophile nor am I into the same sex…but he is your spitting image!" He exclaimed as he caressed the face of the toddler which he had drugged so he wouldn't make a sound. "I might as well keep him, raise him…and __**abuse**__ him." He isn't serious. Abusing a child sexually is sickening. He just wants to scare her so she can try a little harder._

She closes her eyes and pushes the images of him molesting her son. "You wouldn't…you're a father…you have children. He's only three!"

"_He could've been ours! I could've given you that family you oh-so wanted! Why…what did Trevor Langan have that __**I**__ didn't?" he yells. He wants to know why he wasn't good enough for her five years ago. "We would've been happy together…I love you." _

She's getting aggravated with him. "I don't love you…You were an amazing guy, don't get me wrong, but I never felt the same way. Trevor came along…and I can't talk to you about this."

_Furious, he replies, "Sunday's the deadline. I want you and two million dollars. Cash," with that said, he taps the "END" button on his phone and tosses it to the side. He picks up Nicky and throws his limp, but alive, body over his shoulder and leaves. _

Olivia sets her phone down and rubs her eyes, shaking her head. The hand that touches her shoulder startles her out from her thoughts. She looks over her should to find Trevor with Leah balanced in his arms. "Hey," she says softly and takes Leah from him when the fifteen month old holds out her little hands.

Trevor apologizes for startling her just seconds ago before taking her hand and pulling her up from her desk chair. He wraps one arm around her while the other rests against his daughter's back. He buries his nose in her hair and kisses the side of her head, gently. "Hey," he finally responds. "Anything new?" he asks.

"We know who took him."

"Who was it? How is he connected to Mina and us?"

"He's her biological father…and…" she breathes in deeply, still having a difficult time wrapping her head around all this. "David Haden."

Trevor doesn't say anything for the next minute or so. He drops his arms from Olivia and passes a hand through his thick, dark hair. "_David Haden_ kidnapped our son? The joke of a lawyer kidnapped Nicky?" he can't believe it…it was too hard to believe. Everyone that has ever met the man always thought of him to be a great, however, Trevor always thought of him as harmless.

"He was a good lawyer, Trevor…he just fell off the face of the earth after we got together." She whispers.

"I still can't believe this, Olivia."

She licks her lips, unsure of what to say to him now. Elliot said it isn't her fault that Nicky was kidnapped but she can't help but feel like it truly is her fault. She broke the man…he told her himself that he wasn't going anywhere and then she leaves him for Trevor.

Why now?

That's her main question. Why does he choose now to make her suffer...to maker her and Trevor suffer?

She looks up at Trevor cups his face with her hand, "He wants me to go with two million dollars. I don't know why he even wants or needs so much money since he's pretty wealthy, or at least he was when we were together."

Trevor places his hand over hers that was caressing his cheek. "We'll get him back…I'll call my father."

"You haven't spoken to him since Nicky was born, Trevor." She reminds him. "We don't need the money. I'll show up – armed – with back-up." This was David Haden they are talking about. What's the worse he can do to her physically? She knows he's a good man deep down because he was a good man when she met him five years earlier.

* * *

><p>Nick and Elliot kick down the door and have their guns drawn, ready to fire if they need to. They part ways and Fin follows with a uniform backing him up. They search for David and Nicky all over the house but end up with nothing but a note. They meet up in the basement that has a tiny mattress and a blanket.<p>

Elliot kneels down next to the mattress and picks up a small bottle of pills. "Who knows how many of these he crushed and put in Nicky's water?" Elliot then holds up a glass of water that doesn't appear to be clean. "What did your note say?" he asks Fin and Nick.

Fin looks down at his and reads, "_Two million dollars, Detectives, and I want Mrs. Langan all by herself._" He glances over at Nick as does Elliot.

"_Or Nicky dies._" Nick crumbles up the note and tosses it to the other side of the room. "This is Haden? The same EADA that Liv went out with for, like, a month?" he laughs in disbelief. "No way can this be him. Fin, you met that guy. He wouldn't hurt a fly."

"Liv left him because she wasn't ready for a relationship. Two weeks later, she's with Trevor. He's pissed off and in love…" Fin sighs and puts his gun in its holster. "It's unbelievable that he would go as far and as low as this."

Elliot stands up straight and they start leaving the house empty-handed. "Tell me about this David guy."

Fin pokes the inside of his cheek with his tongue. "It wasn't long after you left that that guy showed up, and obviously Liv was still upset about your departure but she needed someone to be there for her, I guess. I don't how that woman's mind works but, yeah, EADA falls hard for Baby-girl but she dumps him…then Trevor comes along…she's never been happier."

_If I had stayed, I could've made her happier than Trevor makes her now…_

That would have only have worked if he left Kathy and like Dickie mentioned the night he came back: Elliot didn't have the balls to go through that then.

He shakes those thoughts away and joins Munch who looks upset just like everyone else. "And to think I used to like the guy. Funny, isn't it?" Munch asks sarcastically and begins to walk away, leaving Elliot alone with his thoughts.

They are back to square one.

Elliot and Fin stand side-by-side as they scan the neighborhood. It's quiet…too quiet. Fin's dark brown eyes lock on a figure moving towards the woods. He taps Elliot on the arm, and Elliot follows Fin's gaze before they broke out into a sprint towards the person. To be safe, they take their gun out their holster and split up because they're unsure which way David, they're assuming, went.

Maybe they aren't back to square one.

Elliot stops running once he catches up to David, he's sure now. He only knows by the picture he had seen earlier when they found out who they are after.

"Turn around."

David slowly turns around to face the older man. He has Nicky pressed up against his chest and a gun aiming in Elliot's direction. "You're the other reason…I know it." His voice is thick with emotion. After five long years, that man still holds on to Olivia. "You're the reason she couldn't move on with me…but Trevor? Why him? What could he offer that I couldn't? Obviously, you were still in the picture then. She gave him a chance…" he swallows hard before dropping his arm to his side. He glances down at the toddler that he's still holding. Nicky's head hangs and his chin is pressing against David's forearm. "Trevor took the woman I had fallen for. I loved – love her."

"It was just a month."

"How long did it take you to fall in love with her? How long did it take her to fall in love with you?" He counters.

"Longer than a month," Elliot retorts. "Let him go," he gestures to the young boy with his gun. He hears David laugh. "I'm not here to play games, Haden. Let Nicky go. You think this is a way to get her love?" he scoffs. "This is only making her hate you more."

"SHUT UP!" David yells and brings the hand holding the weapon to his forehead. He uses the butt of the gun to scratch his temple. "I know that, Elliot. I am an intelligent man…I just want to hurt them both. I waited years to come up with the perfect plan to get back at Trevor and Olivia. This…this is brilliant. Taking the life of their first born, smart don't you agree?"

Elliot takes a step forward. "David, you have children. Think about this…"

David closes his eyes and hears the leaves crackle and twigs snap as Elliot approaches towards him. He brings the gun down and points it at the back of Nicky's head. He doesn't want to do this…not originally. Originally, he wasn't supposed to get caught. Originally, he had planned to be the hero but then he realized that his plan was going nowhere…keeping the boy or killing him were left. He doesn't know what to do…it broke him when she left him. Sure, call him pathetic for falling so fast. What infuriates him more is the fact that it was just after they slept together for the first time…

Was he that bad?

Or was it just some random fuck?

He promised her…he told her he wasn't going anywhere.

_That bitch._

"Put the gun down. Now," Elliot demands.

"I will shoot him…I won't hesitate anymore." He presses the gun harder into the back of the boy's head. "If you don't kill me afterward…I'll kill myself."

"David, don't do it!"

"One…"

Taking one more step.

"Two…"

Then another.

"Three…"

_Bang._

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><p><strong>AN: So…. Hi, thurr. Review? **


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: I haven't been in the biggest mood to write because I just found out that a really good friend of mine is dying. When he was 12, he had cancer. He beat it but they said that in 5 years it was going to come back…it's been 7 and the tumor is back. It's located somewhere in his head that they can't operate. He was doing fine that last couple months…Radiation seemed to have been working but just recently I found out that he was sent home because there was nothing they could do now. I'm really sad because we were close and I don't want to lose someone else to cancer. **

**Also, I'm sorry about last chapter. I thought it over and I came up with 5 different outcomes…and I rewrote this 5 times…but this is the one I decided to use…**

**Oh, and thank you for those who reviewed. You're the only reason why I forced myself to type this despite the writer's block.**

* * *

><p>"<em>David, don't do it!" <em>

"_One…"_

_Taking one more step. _

"_Two…" _

_Then another_

"_Three…"_

_**Bang.**_

_Bang. Bang. _

"An eye for an eye," Hammurabi once said…unfortunately, if everyone continued to follow that eye-for-an-eye rule now, the whole world would have gone blind. One always ends up hurting the other; they should be punished the same way the first person got injured, right? Even death couldn't slide…but that was just how things worked then.

_An eye for an eye…_

Those words keep ringing in his head and it just keeps getting louder that it's becoming almost unbearable. How can he let him die? _What the hell, Elliot? He just killed Nicky! How can you ask yourself that?_ Then it hits him straight in the heart.

_He just killed Nicky. _

Elliot's gun falls from his hand once he loosened his grip in pure shock. He clenches his teeth to keep them from chattering and it isn't even cold at the moment, in fact it was quite the opposite. He feels a chill going up and down his spine once he finally lets his eyes fall to the ground. David is quickly losing blood from his arm and chest, which is where he shot him the second once he dropped both the gun and Nicky after the first shot.

From David, his eyes quickly glance over at the boy. His heart's beating faster as each second goes by. He feels guilty…very guilty. This is his fault…why did he wait so long? He should have done something…but it's too late…he can't do anything now but to only attempt to save the man that just killed a child.

_Fuck me and my morals._

He wants to move his legs forward just a couple more feet then press down on the wounds but he can't bring himself to move. He's frozen…stuck in one place.

_Hurry, Elliot.  
><em>

_You're running out of time._

_You don't want to be responsible for two deaths in one day, do you? No, I don't…_

Yet, he can't move. He tries to put one for in front of the other but they're wobbly and if he thinks that if he tries to put his right in front of his left, he may just collapse then and there. Despite what he thinks, he tries once more only to end up on his knees. He feels the moistness of the dirt below his knees seep into his pants. Elliot doesn't think anything of it especially as he reaches out for the almost lifeless body of David Haden. His fingertips barely touch the sleeve of David's shirt and he forces himself to reach out farther when he feels something on his fingers. Elliot pulls his hand back and notices blood…he watches the crimson roll down the length of his calloused fingers and he isn't sure whose blood it is. Is it Nicky's or David's? He thinks it's the former and just that makes his stomach churn.

Forcing his eyes to look over the toddler for just a quick second, Elliot feels the back of his throat burn. Five years away, has he become soft? Before resigning five years earlier, he was nearing three decades of being on the force.

No, of course he hasn't. This is Olivia's son for God's sake! This is a child…then he remembers that David is slowly dying right under his nose. He places his hands right in front of himself and crawls towards David. The man's breathing is becoming heavy and blood is beginning to come out from his mouth. He's trying to say something…and Elliot isn't sure what.

"Come on, David, stay with me." Elliot chooses to put pressure on David's chest as he continues to talk to the man. "David, don't give up…come on, stay with me." He removes one hand that is now covered in David's blood. He reaches for his radio but before he gets a chance to make the call, Fin and Nick appear.

Elliot drops the device and puts his free hand back on David's chest. He sees David open his mouth and move his lips but no sound comes out. David coughs up more blood and forces himself to speak, even if it's just his last breath. "N-not…Nicky,"

Elliot looks down and furrows his eyebrows at the slightly younger man. "What do you mean, David?"

"Is…is that Nicky?" Nick also drops to his knees and rolls the toddler over. He gasps at the sight.

"Nicky…." He can barely speak but he manages to force out. "Go…to Preston," a small smile plays on his lips and as he closes his eyes he quickly adds, "I can never kill her child. I love her…"

Those are his last words.

Would Olivia want to know that? Would she want to know that his last words were 'I love her' before he died? Would that anger her even more? Also, why did he say to go to Preston? It was apparent that Preston had nothing to do with the kidnapping of Olivia's son.

Then it hits him square in the face.

"Guys," Nick grabs their attention, "he isn't lying. This isn't Nicky."

Fin looks up at the sky, seeing dark clouds beginning to move above their heads. He gets down on one knee and pulls on a latex glove and lifts the boy's lifeless head by the chin with his finger. He has to admit that this boy looked a lot like Nicky, but clearly isn't. He can't blame Elliot for assuming it was Nicky since he's only seen the boy once which was just over a month ago and in pictures.

"…Then where is Nicky?" Fin looks at the other two men before looking back down at the boy. "And who's this kid?" Fin swallows hard at the sight. He just can't believe David did this…but he did. They need to accept that, he thinks.

* * *

><p>Trevor had gone home with Leah just an hour earlier, leaving her at the station with Cassidy as she stared at the computers. She is yet to hear anything new from the guys and it worries her. They were a step closer to finding her son and she was hoping nothing went wrong at the place they had located David.<p>

About two hours later and still yet to hear anything, Olivia begins to pace around her desk whilst biting the tip of her thumb – something she does whenever she's impatient, worried, or nervous. At that moment, she isn't sure what it was. All she knows is that the weird feeling in the pit of her stomach refuses to go away. A part of her is giving up on hope but then again there's this bigger part of her that is still holding on. Her child is alive. That much she knows.

Minutes later, she hears the elevator ding while Cassidy is interviewing a suspect in the rape case in interrogation room three with Rollins. Briscoe is out teaching a rookie the ropes, so that leaves her alone in the bullpen. She hears footsteps and murmurs obviously coming from Elliot, Fin, Munch, and Nick. She holds her breath as she waits for them to come in. She notices the blood on Elliot's hands and shirt. She continues to hold her breath a minute longer and waits for them to say something to her…to look at her.

She approaches them and Elliot purses his lips before shaking his head. "He didn't have Nicky when we caught up to him…he had another kid."

"Where is he?"

"Physically or spiritually?" Nick asks with a grunt.

"What do you mean?"

Elliot clears his throat and moves toward the sink in the corner to wash off the blood from his hands. Munch hasn't said a word ever since they left the second scene where the bodies were collected. Elliot had handed Munch his badge and gun then and there. He knew what was needed to be done.

"He means: David is dead." Elliot says over his shoulder. He makes eye contact with the very moment he had admitted he loved not too long ago to Casey. Casey…he hasn't seen her since their encounter in the cribs…nor has he seen Alex. You would've thought them being her best girlfriends that they'd be there for her. He knows Trevor has been coming in every now then just to be with Olivia…he loves her. He knows. But more that he has ever loved her? God, why is he thinking about this? Nicky's still out there and apparently they need to talk to Preston again.

"Then…where do we go from here?" Olivia asks softly.

"We go to Preston." Munch finally opens his mouth, "It's been almost fifteen hours, Liv, we're bringing that boy home and you're going to take a hell of a lot of days to be with him and the rest of your family."

Years ago, Olivia never thought she'd hear those words directed to her.

_Your family_

"I'm going."

"As in going upstairs…"

"No, Fin, I'm going. This is my son and I don't want to sit on my ass throughout the whole search. Put yourselves in my place, guys. Would you just sit around? Or would you be out there searching for your kid?"

"Go," said Munch, "with Elliot. You two originally arrested Preston in '05, I'm sure you can get something out of him if the dynamic duo is the one questioning him. We'll take care of everything else." By that he was referring to finding out who the dead boy is, who his parents are, and more on David. Then from there, he decides to go back to Mina, but he's beginning to doubt that they will ever get anything from her.

With that said Elliot and Olivia leave…their step in perfect sync and already discussing what they are to do once they get to Preston Martinez.

It was just like the old days.

Before the shooting.

Before he left.

Before things _changed_.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Love me? Hate me? Nicky's still alive. I couldn't kill him off…(yet maybe) ;)**

**Next: More Preston. More E/O. More O/T. More NOlivia friendship. More than this. I'm not completely satisfied with this…so I'd like to know what you think by reviewing :)**

**And to those who have been reading Dead, I'm suffering from serious writer's block and I'll _try_ to have a new chapter up by next week (spring break) and do you guys mind reading Recovering? EO friendship and OT romance. **


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: I wasn't happy with the amount of reviews I got for the last chapter…but thank you to those who did review :) Since my friend passed, I haven't brought myself to write much…but I've been feeling better lately…so yeah…I did proof read this so I apologize…**

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><p><em>With that said Elliot and Olivia leave…their step in perfect sync and already discussing what they are to do once they get to Preston Martinez. <em>

_It was just like the old days. _

_Before the shooting. _

_Before he left. _

_Before things changed._

"Why do you need to see my brother…again?" Rebecca Martinez asks the older man and woman. Unlike when Elliot first came by with Fin and Nick, Rebecca is now wearing jean shorts, a tank top that showed too much of her breast, and her hair was pulled back into a tight pony tail. It seems likely that she's about to go somewhere. When they just continue to stare at her, she sighs, "_Miren_, my brother's sleeping. I don't want to wake-"

"It wasn't a question. You will go get Preston."

"Look, lady-"

"Do you have children, Rebecca?" Olivia asks softly.

Elliot looks over at Olivia and can tell what she's doing. He looks back at the Hispanic woman and waits for her to answer the question although the answer is written all over her face. She's biting her lip and her eyes went from them to her welcome mat.

"Yes, a little girl named Carmen…we called her Carmensita." Rebecca finally speaks softly after a minute or so of silence. She steps to the side and opens the door all the way, allowing the detectives to come inside. "Why do you ask, Detective?"

"Where is your daughter, Rebecca?"

Rebecca exhales loudly and gestures to Elliot and Olivia to take a seat on the leather couch of hers. She sits across from them with her hands clasped together on her lap. She stares down at her hands, watching her thumb stroke the opposite hand's index finger.

A minute goes by.

Two minutes go by.

Then three before she looks up at them with tears in her eyes. "Carmensita is with _Diostio _– God. Her, uh, heart failed. She was born with a heart disease…she, uh, she died last year." Her voice cracked. She swallows the lump in her throat and wipes her hands over her thighs. "Her _desgraciado_ of a father abandoned us when she was three. After she passed, I called him…he didn't even come to the funeral." She whispers the last part and avoids eye contact from the two older detectives sitting across from her.

Another moment of silence goes by before Rebecca lifts her head, and says, "Why?"

"My son is missing."

"Preston didn't take him if that's what you are implying." She quickly defends her younger brother. "He's never out of my sight…I watch after him until he can get his shit together." She takes in a deep breath, "but he is hiding something. What? I don't know. All I know is that something's been on his mind for the last couple of months."

Elliot nods. He's not sure if he should believe Rebecca because siblings protect each other…he's witnessed it several times as he watched his children grow up. He and his siblings protected each other but nothing was ever this major. It was usually the littlest things, like, who broke the window with the baseball? Who broke mom's china? Of course, those were done by the boys and not the girls who rarely got into any trouble. Those were the times. Elliot thinks that maybe he should give his siblings a call to see how they're doing. He hasn't heard from them in longer than five years. What a brother he was.

Elliot runs a hand over his dark-cropped hair before asking Rebecca a question that may just put them a step closer to finding Nicky. "Does the name David Haden sound familiar to you?" Elliot mentally crosses his fingers and his blue eyes stare intently into the young woman's brown ones.

She sighs and appears to also be debating whether or not to answer honestly. She's heard the name come out of Preston's mouth one too many times within that last couple of months but it was never more than "I need to go see a friend named David Haden" or "I have to make an important call to David". She had stopped asking him questions about the man when he snapped at her. A part of her had thought maybe her baby brother was gay and David was this man in his life.

He laughed.

Yes, he laughed when she told him that.

Rebecca licks her lips and clears her throat, "I've heard it every now and then. It's someone Preston would talk to a lot. I don't know anything, really." She responds, honestly. Her eyes are still locked on Elliot's colored ones until she can't take the eye contact anymore. She lowers her eyes to the glass table between her and the detectives. A _People en Español _is open and the picture of William Levy –shirtless– is the first thing that catches her eyes. Below the picture is the article in tiny print that she can't read from where she sits. She needs some sort of distraction and William Levy's well defined chest and abs seem to be it.

They hear a wolf whistle coming from the direction of the stairs that led downstairs to the basement. "Detective Benson, you're still lookin' as hot as ever…" he approached them with a smile on his fair-skinned face. Unlike the first time Elliot came by, the young man now wears dark blue jeans and a wife beater. The man takes a seat next to his sister and rests his elbows on his knees, leaning forward. "What did I supposedly do this time?" he asks them, sounding ruder than he intended.

Elliot glares at Preston for a moment before leaning forward, now resting his elbows on his knees. "Haden, before he died, said to-"

"He's dead?"

Preston stands up and paces around the living room, mumbling to himself that it isn't true, that David is very much alive. "Why…Why do you lie to me? You love torturing me." His brown eyes are sad once he looks at the detectives. Olivia stands up and slowly makes her way towards Preston. "Stop," he practically begs and takes a step back to get away from her, to keep the distance bigger between them. "Please…just stop. You killed him?" the question is directed at Elliot, but his eyes are locked with Olivia's darker brown eyes. "He told me…He told me he had a kid with him. He said it looked like the little Langan kid – your kid." He pauses just momentarily, "he told me something else."

With a sigh, he takes two steps towards Olivia, causing Elliot to stand up. His chocolate eyes dart over to the older man then back at the older woman. "Detective Benson, I know where your son is."

* * *

><p>"Could this little brat be any more annoying?"<p>

A young woman and man cover their ears with their hands and think of ways to shut the crying toddler up without killing or harming him. It's turning out to be more difficult than expected because the boy has been crying since he woke up which was just over half an hour ago.

"Why did dad drop him off with us?" The male asks his sister, finally uncovering his ears and straightens his green tie that doesn't match his purple dress shirt.

The woman rolls her eyes at her brother with a scoff. "We're his least favorite that's for sure. There's no way in hell that he would drop off the kidnapped kid off to Brett or Nancy – the goody-two-shoes of the family.

"Why couldn't he just drop the kid off at some park? Or better yet, kill him? Marge, he's so complicated. I can't believe he had Mina do this. That kid's got a lot left to do in her teenage years." With a sigh, he continues, "Dad's always been an ass."

"Whatever…let's just get this over with, Jay." She looks around the small living room and finds a roll of duct tape sitting on top of the small television. She rips off a piece and places it over the toddler's mouth, muffling his cries.

"When is dad coming to pick him up?" Jay asks his sister, becoming more annoyed by the second as the boy continues to cry harder. "I'm already on probation."

Suddenly, the door is kicked open and a deep voice rang out.

"FREEZE!"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Shorter than usual, I think. Um…yeah. **

**Who's at the door? Elliot? Nick? Fin? **

**The family reunites…but things aren't so great even after they have Nicky back. Definitely more Dickie and Lizzie. I bet you guys missed them :') maybe a little visit from Kathleen? And finally, Casey. **

**Review?**


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